


Where seasons will take me

by av_versiera



Category: K-pop, Super Junior
Genre: M/M, Mild Smut, Romance, agegap, cowboy, farmau, somecrossdressing, wildwestkindofvibe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-02
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-04-06 09:14:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 33,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19059658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/av_versiera/pseuds/av_versiera
Summary: Donghae is a seasonal worker who frequents a certain farm every year.





	1. Chapter 1

Donghae knows her by her strawberry stained lips, by the fruit's sweet juice trickling down her plump mouth and to her sharp chin. He thinks about her briefly as another year dawns on him and he has to move again, packing his knapsack with his few belongings- a Bible, a knife, extra shirts, a few bills for his transportation, and a guitar that goes around his whole torso. He dons his strawhat on his head, and he boards the fat, metal bus that will take him across the country along with other farmers, ranchers or men from the city that needed to work. The men yawned into the cold, crisp morning air, and Donghae takes a deep breath that makes his lungs fill with freshness. In a country that has fallen into depression, there are no stable jobs available. The country had also fallen into a lawless state, where those who could not earn a living became gangsters or robbers. Everyone is starving and growing disillusioned, and nobody wants to get along. If you're not committing a crime, then you're not earning a living.

Donghae boards the bus, following tanned and taut men who have been working all winter and are now off to another place to find a job. Donghae knows a place, where a certain young sweetheart resides, but for his third year visiting it, he had never even asked for her name, or even told her that her gummy smile is beautiful.

 

Donghae clutches his knapsack to him, and he rides out a delicious excitement coming through his body. This year, he will definitely gather the courage to say hello, and tell her that she has a beautiful smile.

 

~

 

Donghae arrives at noon, with the sun directly shining on his eyes. Donghae squints as he steps off the metal can, and he adjusts his straw hat. A chubby guy strides beside him and offers a kind smile, and Donghae returns it willingly. He likes to think that he's a decent guy, except, he has knife, just in case.

"Hiya," the other man greets.

 

Donghae nods, and taps his hat. "Hello."

"Where're you headin'?"

Donghae recalls a pair of pale, beautiful hands from his memory and a smile delivers itself on his lips. "To Heechul's ranch."

The guy grins widely. "Me too! I'm Shindong by the way," he introduces himself by pointing his thumb to his chest.

"Donghae," he supplies.

Shindong chuckles. "What kind of name is that?" He adjusts his own knapsack behind him.

Donghae gives him a funny look. "What?"

"Donghae-bada, the east sea," Shindong pronounces carefully.

 

The two men walked towards the said ranch, their boots crunching on dry soil. Behind them, a group of men also walked, heading to Heechul's ranch to work the spring and summer away. Shindong shares his can of peaches, and Donghae gives him a handful of nuts, and without any vocal agreement, they become friends right there and then.

 

"So where did you come from?" Shindong inquires.

"I've been everywhere." He glances at Shindong. "I don't really have a family."

"Oh, well, me too!" Shindong chirps. "I mean, they died from the recent disease that was spreading around."

Donghae presses his lips together. "I'm sorry."

Shindong nods, but he doesn't give it another thought.

 

They arrive at the ranch a good hour or two before the sunset. Donghae and the other men come up to the white house up the hill to see the owner and get their tasks for tomorrow, and to also get dinner and boarding. Donghae looks around, and his eyes linger on the strawberry fields in the distance, knowing that in a month or so, it would be time to harvest them. His mind takes him back to last year, where he saw her running around through it, a basket hooked around her sharp elbow, her big, floppy hat covering her small face. Her yellow sundress make her seem like a butterfly speeding through the field.

 

The men eat their dinner at sundown, and strong drinks were served along with more bread and hot soup. They grow rowdy, and they retell each other of their adventures or their past work last season. Donghae sits with Shindong, minding his own business.

 

A muscular man with a handsome, squared face plops down beside Donghae and greets them politely.

"I'm Kangin," he introduces himself.

"Shindong."

Donghae slurps his soup carefully.

"Aren't you going to tell me your name?" Kangin asks.

Donghae glances at him and sighed. He didn't really want to make friends because he moves around so much that he doesn't really get to see them after their first meeting. "Donghae."

 

Kangin nods, but he was unbothered that the younger man was a bit rude. "So, Donghae, what's your day gonna look like tomorrow?"

Donghae dips his bread on the soup. "I'm going to take care of the livestock."

"Oh, nice. I'm going to be watching the watermelons," Kangin says excitedly.

Donghae can't help the tiny smile that is making its way to the corner of his lips.

 

Kangin spends the rest of the night talking about watermelons, but Donghae didn't mind.

 

//

 

Donghae meets Sungmin by the stables, who is in charge of making sure that everything runs well with the livestock animals. The soft-faced man lets him fetch his beige colored horse, and Donghae pats her on her mane.

 

"Hey there, sweetheart," Donghae greets gently. "Did you miss me? It's been a while."

The horse neighs gently, leaning into Donghae's kind touch.

 

Sungmin helps him with the saddle, and together they lead their horses outside. Donghae boards his horse, and he puts up his straw hat to shield him from the morning sun. A dog barks in the distance, and he spots Leeteuk letting out the cows and the sheeps so they can roam the fields. Leeteuk spots him and waves an excited arm, and Donghae grins back and shouts hello.

 

Sungmin chuckles. "Let's go. We have some fence repairs to do."

 

Donghae spends his time repairing a broken part of the fence until noon, then he heads back with Sungmin to get some lunch. He whistles a tune, a song often sung by men going to war. He keeps his eye in the distance, where a few cows grazed around, their tails flickering and their heads down to the grass.

 

"Do you have a sweetheart yet?" Sungmin inquires teasingly.

Donghae glances at him. "No."

Sungmin chuckles, and he releases a breath. "I'm getting married in the fall!" He announces excitedly.

Donghae laughs. "Congratulations!"

"Will you stay for the wedding?"

Donghae ponders on this. "If I'm still here, yes."

Sungmin's nose wrinkle, a cute sight on his soft face. "Maybe if you stay here longer, you might meet someone," he suggests.

Donghae rolls his eyes.

 

"Ah, Donghae. Life is short. You'll need someone by your side. We're not getting any younger," Sungmin tells him.

"Yeah, but think about the times we are in. The country is not a good place to build a family safely," Donghae reasons.

Sungmin gives him a kind smile. "If you're already thinking like that, you're probably ready to have one."

 

Donghae holds on to the reins, thinking deeply.

 

They leave their horses under a tree and hooks a rope to the lower branches. Together, they make their way up the hill, towards the big, white house. A few workers come up with them, and Donghae spots Kangin and Shindong somewhere in the back.

 

Donghae almost pauses in his steps completely when he saw her on the front porch, holding a tray filled with glasses of cold water. Her long hair falls down her shoulders in dark waves, and Donghae gapes, mesmerized. This is the first time he's seen her up close. She wore a white sundress today, revealing her taut and sinewy arms that never seemed to tan despite being out under the sun. Her single-lidded eyes peer at them with excitement, and Donghae forgets how to say thank you when she offers the tray to him. Donghae can only stare at her sculpted face, and notices the small mole on the front of her cheek.

The men oggled at her, having been deprived of meeting women from all the times they have to spend time with other men.

 

Donghae enters the house, his face red, and Sungmin elbows him on the ribs playfully. His deepening blush had nothing to do with the heat outside.

 

//

 

After a long day spent roaming around the ranch's large perimeter, Donghae gets ready to gather the livestock and lead them back to their respective barns. Leeteuk's dog bounds after the cows, barking excitedly and with lots of energy. He scans the horizon, and counts the animals so that there is no one missing. He also keeps alert for any threat since wolves and coyotes can slip through their fences. Sungmin rides his horse all around, making sure that every animal is accounted for, then the two of them, with other men as well start their hoarding.

The sun had completely set when they finish with their jobs, and Donghae's stomach rumbles from hunger.

 

Donghae looks around the rowdy dining room, scanning for one face in particular, but she is nowhere to be seen. He eats the good food in disappointment, but he laughs along Kangin and Shindong's comedic show, which the other men had also tuned into.

 

Leeteuk and Heechul appear in the dining room as well, accompanied by a scrawny, pale boy. He smiles brightly as well, and he goes to sit by Sungmin and another man that goes with the name Kyuhyun. Together, they strike up a conversation that sends the boy screeching from laughter.

Donghae listens to him, finding his laughter a bit too familiar, but he doesn't think much of it.

He also tries not to linger on his eyes because they are also too familiar.

 

//

 

When Donghae came to the barn the next day, he doesn't find his horse in her usual spot. He looks around the stables, trying to recall if he had put her in the right stable, but she was nowhere to be seen. Sungmin chooses to come in right at that moment, looking as cheerful as always. He places a hand on his hip and raised an eyebrow.

"What's up?"

"Have you seen my horse?" Donghae asks.

Sungmin taps his chin. "Well...she's with her true owner."

Donghae's face fell at this. "Oh..."

 

Sungmin chuckles. "It doesn't matter, just go pick another one!"

 

Donghae's new horse is stubborn and very hard to get along with. He almost gets bucked off, and the horse almost never goes in the direction Donghae is trying to guide him to. He groans in frustration, missing his usual horse already. Sungmin only laughs at him, not helping one bit.

 

As Donghae grazes through the fields, he sees his horse, but she was boarded by someone else entirely.

 

As if knowing his rider's thoughts, the brown horse makes a beeline for the sandy colored one, and Donghae gasps, trying his best to stop this stubborn animal.

"Hey!" Donghae protests.

 

The sandy horse's tail flickers, and at the same time, its owner finds Donghae's eyes.

 

She widens her single-lidded eyes, and she uses her legs-her milky, white legs, oh god-to squeeze her horse's sides.

Donghae yelps, and suddenly, the two of them are involved in a chase.

 

"Hey boy, calm down!" Donghae chides. You don't make a very good wingman, he briefly thinks.

 

The girl leans forward, and the beige horse goes faster. However, Donghae's horse is very determined to catch up. Donghae almost gets whiplashed as his own horse sped through the field and into a path.

"What are you doing?!"

 

Donghae looks up ahead, her voice snatched by the wind.

 

"Stop your horse!" She bellows.

"You stop yours first!"

"Excuse me?"

 

Then, they were neck to neck, and Donghae watches as her thin arms reach for his reins expertly.

"Yah! What are you doing?" Donghae exclaims.

 

She succeeds in tugging his reins from him, and a few moments later, their horses are running side by side in synchronization. They slow down a bit later, and she hands him back the reins.

"That's my horse," Donghae claims.

 

She sends him an annoyed look. "No, she's not. She's been with me ever since I was born."

"Oh, yeah? What's her name?"

"Sandy," she snaps sassily. Donghae notices that there's a deepness in her voice.

"What kind of name is that?" Donghae taunts playfully. Inside, he facepalms himself. He didn't even know the horse's name.

 

Her pale skin flushes a little, and Donghae chuckles. "I'm Donghae."

She scoffs. "Whatever."

 

She rides ahead of him, and Donghae pushes his horse to catch up.

"What is your problem?" She snaps.

Donghae smiles. "You haven't told me your name."

"Well, then. You're not really going to find out."

 

Donghae pouts, but then an idea comes to mind. "How about we race? If I win, I get to know your name. If you win, you're free to keep Sandy all to yourself."

"That doesn't sound like a good deal," she muses.

Donghae chuckles as he sees her pout. "Then, what do you propose?"

She sighs heavily, something a lady would not do in a presence of a man. To think about it, she's not even riding the horse the way a lady should. "Fine, I'll race you. But not with these horses."

 

//

 

Donghae stands by her side, noticing that they have the same heights as each other. He observes her sharp side profile, not believing himself that he's right next to her. He looks up at the white house on top the hill, and he gulps. He never taught running up a hill has been this daunting.

 

"Ready," she warns. "One, two....three!"

 

They shot up the path, and Donghae sees her form pass him in great speed.


	2. Chapter 2

Unfortunately, he did not get her name. He also had to bear the teasing of the other men in the ranch, because they all heard about the race this morning, and he becomes the laughingstock for the night. He grumbles to himself, not liking the attention at all. Leeteuk and Heechul show up with the usual scrawny kid, but the girl who had embarrassed him is nowhere to be seen. Heechul gets the men excited with his exaggerated stories, while Leeteuk supplies a few details that gets the men roaring with even more laughter. Donghae keeps his thoughts to himself, when the scrawny boy suddenly plops beside him without warning.

 

Donghae merely glances at him, but then takes another look when he offers a kind smile.

 

"I'm Hyukjae," he introduces. His voice is light and soft, like the girl that looks just like him.

Donghae nods. "I'm Donghae."

"I've heard," Hyukjae smiles teasingly.

Donghae notices his sinewy arms, and he gets reminded of her again, and he scowls. Whatever had he seen in her.

 

The boy laughs childishly, and Donghae can't help smiling at the sound.

"Where's your sister?" Donghae asks, trying not to sound too interested.

The boy raises a pretty eyebrow, and he smirks. "I don't have a sister," Hyukjae remarks.

"Then, who was that girl who beat me in the race?" Donghae grumbles.

 

Hyukjae chuckles, his eyes glinting with a secret. "Me," he replies in a joking tone.

Donghae groans ungracefully. He's not up for more teasing, especially from this young brat. "Whatever. If you come across her, tell her that I want a rematch."

Hyukjae chuckles lightly, and pours him a drink from the jug near them. "Try not to get your man pride make you do something foolish."

 

He moves away to help Leeteuk and Heechul serve the working men, and Donghae notices his nice, thin legs as he moves around in his shorts.

 

//

 

Donghae offers to repair the tractors that were used for making hay and to chop wood at night. He wanted to do something destructive with his hands from the annoyance that he had to endure yesterday, and now, today as well. The sun beats him down, and his sweat runs down his forehead, his chest, and it's also starting to collect under his armpits. Still, he keeps working, taking apart the machinery and finding the defect so he can correct it. His fingers are now covered with the black oil, and his skin felt really hot. A few times, Donghae stops to wipe the sweat from his forehead, or to wipe his fingers on his soiled shirt.

As the sun move towards noon, he decides to take a break. He arranges his tools, his thoughts surprisingly blank. Unknowingly to him, the girl that had beaten him yesterday was staring at him appreciatively, from his exposed muscular arms, to his wide chest and the sweat covering his neck.

 

Donghae catches movement before him, and he looks up.

 

His face fall in a scowl as he spots the girl from yesterday, but today, her hair is blond.

 

She grins playfully, and Donghae's stomach turns. Behind her was a wagon, filled with towels and pouches of water to be distributed.

 

Donghae stares at her warily, wondering why she bares her legs confidently when she's surrounded by men.

"You've been working hard," she comments.

 

Donghae gapes at her as she leans over to grab a towel, and a pouch of water. She comes closer and Donghae takes a step back nervously.

She sighs, and Donghae hears a deepness in her tone. "Hm," she pouts. She suddenly reaches over and uses the towel to wipe the sweat on Donghae's forhead.

Realizing what's happening, Donghae suddenly grabs the towel from her big, slender hand. "Um, I got it, thanks."

She shrugs, and then holds out the pouch of water. Her elbow did not have to extend much since they are almost in each other's space.

 

Donghae gulps.

She scrutinizes him for a second, her eyebrows raised, but then she turns around to drag her wagon.

 

Donghae considers hitting himself with the towel.

 

//

 

Donghae wakes up late, his body feeling sore from all the heavy work he did yesterday. It takes him some time to actually sit up even though the soreness was not that bad. He just didn't feel like working today, but he thinks about his way of living, and that immediately gets him moving to his feet. He pulls on his worn leather boots, and he stretches his limbs. He also yawns loudly in the process, and he blinks the sleep away from his eyes. He groggily makes his way downstairs, smelling the mouth-watering aroma of fried eggs and bacon, fresh-baked bread and some pastries.

He shows up at the huge dining area, spotting a lone figure with the long blond hair seated by one of the long tables, the daylight making her hair look almost white.

 

She was eating messily, shoving the pieces of pancakes into her mouth, making her cheeks puff out. On the seat to her left, a plate is prepared, completed with utensils and a glass of milk. She suddenly turns around, and she offers a small smile.

 

"Eat," she tells him. "I made the pancakes, and prepared the milk as well."

Donghae yawns, and plops down on the seat near her. "Did you make all of this?"

She laughs airily, making Donghae's inside flutter. "No, Kyuhyun and some other guys helped."

 

She puts some bread on his plate, as well as eggs and bacon, then put pancakes on top of it all. She also pushes the plate of fruits toward him, and sets the bottle of apple syrup by his reach. Donghae can only stare at her and her caring actions, and he can't help feeling comfortable and at home. A sad thought dawns to him.

He wishes he has this everyday, and that he did not have to move around so much.

 

"Eat plenty of food!" She chirps, and continues to shove food in her mouth, and it disappears as quickly, as if it was being sucked by a black hole.

Donghae chuckles, and he shoves a slice of pancake into his mouth.

 

Donghae sees Heechul walk in, holding a few pieces of paper. He studies it for a second, then heads toward the girl near him, who is grunting in satisfaction, with food bits gathering at the corner of her mouth.

"Haiiirrghhh," she greets Heechul once he was near them.

 

Heechul smiles, a gentle look on his face. He pats the girl on the head, and kisses the top of her head.

 

"Be good, Hyukjae-ah," Heechul tells her.

 

Donghae stares at the exchange in bewilderment, then when the realization hits him, he chokes on his food.

 

She-no, he-turns to him in alert and immediately handed him the glass of milk.

Donghae coughs, and he whacks his chest. Careful not to spit everything out from his mouth, he takes his time chewing.

 

The girl-no, rather, the boy-stares at him in amusement.

Donghae recalls that night, when Hyukjae had sat beside him.

 

"Hyukjae???!" Donghae almost shouts after with the struggle of getting the food down.

Well, at least he finally knows her-no, his- name.

 

//

 

Donghae frowns into the night, his fingers gently strumming his guitar. After working all day on the fields, he feels exhaustion catching up to him. However, he did not want to sleep yet. A certain irritating kid keeps intruding his thoughts, and suddenly, he finds himself strumming his guitar mindlessly. Every year, he had looked forward to coming to Heechul's farm because he was excited to get a glimpse of her. Now, not only did she humiliate him, she also tricked him. He even considered courting her, and had started saving up money for a future wife. He can only spite at his foolish self. It's not like Hyukjae commanded him to like her. It was all in his accordance. Hyukjae didn't ask for Donghae's interest.

 

Donghae shakes his head, and he starts a new song. He hums softly, pulling melodies from his mind, and pretty soon, he was too engrossed to focus on anything else.

 

He doesn't notice Hyukjae sitting down beside him, an elbow propped on his knee, and his other arm pushing a bowl of porridge and bread towards him.

 

Hyukjae sits there, listening to his music and observing Donghae's concentrated face. He pushes his dress down to cover his knees, and he stares straight ahead, where the full moon is almost touching the open fields of Heechul's farm.

 

Donghae's focus is starting to break, and when he glances beside him, he almost jumps to his feet. He jerks away, startled, and he hits his knee with his guitar.

"What are you doing here?"

Hyukjae smooths his blond hair from his shoulder and gives Donghae an unimpressed look. "You didn't have dinner, so I came to find you."

 

Donghae licks his lips and he notices the bowl of porridge beside him. He picks it up, noticing that it has cooled. "How long have you been out here?"

"Did you make that song?" Hyukjae inquires curiously.

 

Donghae suddenly feels like his privacy was invaded. "Yeah, what about it?" He answers back in a petulant way.

Hyukjae rolls his eyes, his patience obviously thinning from the moment Donghae opened his mouth. "Nothing, I just wanted to know. I was going to compliment you, but nevermind. You're an ass."

 

Donghae frowns, and he munches on the bread silently. Then, after letting the silence ebb away their initial feelings, Donghae glances at Hyukjae, who is pouting off into space. "Thank you."

Hyukjae shrugs, his toned shoulders moving up and down. Donghae spots moles decorating his skin.

 

"Why?" Donghae asks without any tact.

Hyukjae glances at him. "It's fun."

Donghae looks at him incredulously.

"What?" Hyukjae chuckles.

"No, seriously, why?"

Hyukjae narrows his eyes at him. "Did I ruin your manly fantasies?"

Donghae leans away in disbelief, although that would probably explain why he's been sulky all day. "No!" He scoffs.

"Wow."

"That's not it!" Donghae reasons.

"Hm-hm."

"Seriously, why?"

Hyukjae stares at Donghae a little bit too long, then he finally responded. "It helps with keeping men on the land, especially now that the country is in a depression. You'd think that will open up some jobs but even lands are in a depreesion." Hyukjae pouts. "Leeteuk and Heechul disapproves, but it helps. This land depends on labor. It also pays off when Leeteuk and I go to the towns to sell our products."

 

Donghae feels his heart break. "Do you not like it?"

"No, I like it. It's fun. But the men part, not really."

"Oh," Donghae deadpans.

 

They share more silences together, but this time, it's more comfortable.

 

"Do you work here?"

"No, I live here. I'm Heechul's nephew from my mom's side."

"What about Leeteuk?"

"Heechul's partner."

"So basically, your fathers?"

 

Hyukjae chuckles. "That's one way to put it."

"It's nice. They are good people."

"I know," Hyukjae tucks a blond strand behind his ear. Then he raises an eyebrow at Donghae. "Finding about these things about me...do you get repulsed by it?"

Donghae shakes his head. "No, it's nice, like I said. Family is family. It's always good to have family."

Hyukjae's lips tilt upwards. "You came back for me, right?" He teases.

 

Donghae feels heat rising to his cheeks. "No!" He protests too quickly. "It-it's just y-y-Heechul pays well!"

Hyukjae peers at him, unconvinced. "Yeah, sure. Pervert."

Donghae's eyes widen and his face heats without stopping. His heart is pounding loudly in his ears.

 

Hyukjae laughs, and peace settles between them. Donghae finds that he did not want to get up from his spot yet, even though his ass is really starting to numb. Hyukjae sighs, and Donghae catches the way his lips pout naturally. He's really pretty...

 

"I wanted to make you my wife," Donghae suddenly blurts out, his mind getting ahead of itself. He immediately wants to plummet himself six feet underground.

Hyukjae stands up, his face twisting in annoyance. "Pervert!" He exclaims.

 

Hyukjae trudges away from him, leaving Donghae flabberghasted. Donghae tries to figure out why he suddenly said that, but then, he was never really good at holding in his blunt words. Besides, the atmosphere between them was too comfortable, and he felt like he can tell Hyukjae anything.

Donghae sighs. Great.

 

Unknown to Donghae, Hyukjae walks away with a gentle smile playing on his lips. He skips towards his room, and he tries out Donghae's name in his lips, repeating it slowly, letting the syllables roll off his tongue.

 

Donghae goes to bed that night, marvelling at the fact that he got his name, and was also let in on a secret. It almost feels like he's part of something, even though it's kind of a grand scheme to earn profit, but then everyone does benefit from it. He closes his eyes, and the image of his lips against his pale, moonlight skin appears just beneath his eyelids.


	3. Chapter 3

Donghae finds Hyukjae on the breakfast table surrounded by hollering men.

He spots him sitting with legs wide opened, and his shoulders squared, but he is wearing a white dress today, and his blond hair is styled into low pigtails. His other arm is up, and he seems to be armwrestling with Kangin.

 

Donghae watches the spectacle before him, amused at seeing this kind of event so early in the morning. The men shouts in disappointment when Hyukjae suddenly brings Kangin's arm down. Donghae blinks, wondering how those string arms can even defeat Kangin, who he knows is a very strong man. Hyukjae looks up, and he starts to motion for Donghae to step forward. Realizing what was happening, Donghae shakes his head vigorously, his hands held out towards him.

 

Hyukjae smirks, and uses his finger to beckon him forward.

Donghae can only gulp.

 

"Lee Donghae! Lee Donghae!" Kangin starts to chant.

Donghae lets out a sheepish smile. "No, no thanks!"

The men start to cheer for Donghae.

 

"What? You scared of being beaten by a girl again?" Hyukjae taunts.

Donghae is pretty sure his face is as red as a strawberry. "I lost on purpose."

Hyukjae rolls his eyes. "Sure. Come here, Donghae," he commands.

 

The men cheered as Donghae plops on the seat across Hyukjae. He lays his elbow on the table, and encloses his fingers around Hyukjae's hand, and he feels its softness. He marvels at this, and he glances at Hyukjae, who is smirking at him.

"Ready?" Hyukjae says.

Donghae smiles. "What do I get if I win?"

 

Hyukjae's mouth puckers in amusement. "A kiss?"

The men around them cheers and woots.

Donghae's eyes flit to Hyukjae's mouth, and suddenly, he finds himself wondering how it would feel or taste like. "All right."

Hyukjae tightens his grip on Donghae's hand. "Mind you, no man has ever lost to me."

Donghae raises an eyebrow, feeling his competitiveness soar. "Oh yeah?" He challenges. "Today might be that day."

 

Kangin holds the top of their fists together. "One, two, three!"

 

Donghae and Hyukjae grit their teeth as they battle for dominance. Donghae grips the edge of the table to help himself, but Hyukjae is surprisingly very strong despite his lanky appearance. Hyukjae grunts, and Donghae feels his muscles flex as he tries to fight Hyukjae.

 

Hyukjae grins at him. "So...do you really want to kiss me?"

 

Donghae briefly glances up, and Hyukjae uses that opportunity to push Donghae's arm down with all of his strength.

 

Hyukjae reaches over and pats Donghae's cheek. "I win."

Donghae sighs, and he feels himself flush red as the men around him laughed.

"Did you also lose on purpose?" Hyukjae asks. The room quiets down a little. "Is this your way of getting my attention?"

 

"Ooohh," someone cooes.

"Lover boy!"

"Kiss her!"

 

Hyukjae rolls his eyes.

Donghae is speechless to even deny anything.

 

//

 

Sungmin elbows Donghae's ribs when they entered the stable together.

"She likes you," Sungmin says, giggling like an idiot.

 

Donghae fumes as he gather the reins for his horse. "No thanks."

"Aw, Donghae. Why not?"

Because she's not who you think she is.

 

"Well," Sungmin trails off thoughtlessly. "I think she likes you."

Donghae's head snaps up at this. "What? Why?" He whines slightly.

Sungmin chuckles. "What? I thought you like her."

 

She's actually a man in disguise. Donghae groans. He wonders if he's the only one who knows about her secret. Does Sungmin know? He often hangs out with Hyukjae, along with that guy who always seem to have a flask of alcohol around.

 

The two of them lead their horses out of the stables, and he spots Hyukjae carrying two heavy coils of rope in each shoulder. He gapes at him, as he skips toward Leeteuk with a bright smile, his blond pigtails bouncing up and down. Hyukjae turns his way briefly and winks at him, and Donghae wants nothing but to run and hide somewhere else.

 

I wanted you to be my wife.

"Gahhh!" Donghae suddenly exclaims. He cringes at his yesterday self.

Sungmin stares at Donghae. "If you want a wife, I don't think-"

"I don't want her as my wife!" He interrupts loudly.

 

Hyukjae hears Donghae's shouting and turns his way. "Oi, Donghae!"

Donghae frowns at his direction.

"Stop yelling, you'll scare the animals!"

 

//

 

Wherever Donghae goes anywhere in the farm, he always comes across Hyukjae. He really has been trying to avoid him at all costs-even taking the most difficult jobs that required traveling at the farthest side of the land. However, Hyukjae always manages to find him, and Donghae ends up becoming a machine that cannot multi-task.

Honestly, it is probably his fault he ended up in this situation. He wonders where the Hyukjae from last night had gone, because it was so much easier to talk to him. Whenever Hyukjae puts on his daylight persona, something in Donghae stirs, like his stomach, because he remembers every thought that he harbored for her. There were nights where he could not take her off his mind, where he had to close his eyes and let his hands work out his frustrations.

 

He just wishes he did not know any better. He was a travelling man anyways, there was no way he could have provided a proper life for someone else. He just couldn't stop hoping for something better even when there's nothing.

 

Donghae heaves the last stack of hay and packs it on the giant carriage. He wipes his sweat from his brow, and even took off his shirt to wipe the rest of his body with it.

 

"Here," a voice suddenly said and Donghae jumps in his place.

Hyukjae is a few steps away from him, holding out a clean towel. 

 

Donghae takes it warily, and Hyukjae beams at him kindly. 

 

They spend a few moments in silence, and Donghae thinks that he has lost the ability to move at all. He couldn't speak or take a step, but his eyes do find Hyukjae's face, framing them into his mind and he thinks, oh, he's beautiful. His heart acknowledges a fluttering feeling, but his brain refuses to name it. 

 

"Do you want to head back with me? You skipped lunch," Hyukjae suggests.

Donghae looks around him and he realizes that he had finished his assigned job for the day. Hyukjae's kindness makes him take a step forward, which the latter interprets as a yes. 

 

Hyukjae gestures with his head, and together, they make their way towards the house on top of the hill. 

 

"You're weirded out, aren't you?" Hyukjae starts as they ascend the hill. 

Donghae was snapped away from his thoughts. "Huh?" He replies dumbly. 

 

Hyukjae chuckles and he looks down at his feet. "You think I'm weird, right?" 

 

Donghae counts the moles on Hyukjae's neck, but he keeps it to himself. "No. I'm just surprised."

Hyukjae glances at him. 

Donghae presses his lips together, but then he manages a smile. "I didn't think anything bad. We can be friends."

Hyukjae laughs, a sweet laugh, like those ripening strawberries on the field. "How cute. Are you sure you just want to be friends?"

 

Donghae rolls his eyes. "Forgive me, but I really thought you were a girl."

"So I was right."

Donghae scratches the back of his head. "Look Hyukjae, I'm sorry-"

"Stop apologizing. Like you said. We can be friends," Hyukjae says. "That is, if you can see past all this."

Donghae adjusts his straw hat. "I can."

"Are you sure? You won't get scared off?" Hyukjae goads. 

 

Donghae frowns, a newfound determination building inside him. He deems himself to be a good man, and he is not going to be a coward. This detail won't make him run. 

"I've never had friends before, Donghae," Hyukjae suddenly said in a small voice. "Of course, there's Sungmin and Kyuhyun, but they're family from Leeteuk's side."

 

Donghae pauses as they take a step towards the front porch. Hyukjae stops as well, glancing back at him, his expression taut, as if he wants to spill his whole life story then and there. Donghae takes another step until they are face to face, height to height. He notices a faint blush on Hyukjae's cheeks, which makes him look really endearing. He brings a hand up to Hyukjae's face and he gently brushes the strands of his golden hair. He didn't know what warranted this action, but it felt right at the moment. 

"We can be friends," Donghae firmly says. He meets Hyukjae's eyes, trying to convey his sincerity. 

 

Hyukjae gives him a genuine smile, filled with his teeth and gums, and Donghae remembers that he needed to tell him that his smile is beautiful.

But not right now.

 

//

 

The night is as loud as any other, and Hyukjae's daylight disguise has gone to retire. Donghae sits with his usual group of people, but he couldn't help looking for a particular delicate face. He eats his food well, nodding to whatever Shindong and Kangin are talking about, but their conversation is lost to his mind. Finally, as the men continued to chatter, Donghae spots Hyukjae walking towards Sungmin and Kyuhyun, a tray of food in his hands. Donghae abruptly stands from his seat and he intercepts the younger, which made Hyukjae stare at him in confusion. 

 

"Sit with me," Donghae invites, a little bashful. 

Hyukjae lets out a small giggle, but he nods, and follows Donghae to an empty table. Others gave them glances of curiosity, which made Donghae's face heat, but he doesn't pay them any mind. 

They simultaneously lowered themselves to their seats, and at the same time, put their trays down on the table. At first, the two of them concentrated on their food. Although they can banter at day, and tease each other, sitting down like this in a peaceful way, they find that it's hard to even talk about anything. Not to mention, the elephant in the room. 

 

"So," Hyukjae begins, unable to stand the silence between them. (Although, Donghae was really fine with that).

"Yes?" 

"How about that rematch?" 

 

Donghae glances at Hyukjae critically. 

 

Hyukjae places his elbow on the table, and holds up his hand. "If you beat me, you can use my horse for the rest of your time here."

"And if I lose?" Donghae says, setting down his utensil. 

Hyukjae shrugs. "Maybe I'll kiss you."

Donghae gapes at Hyukjae. "You know, I don't really see you in that way."

"See me in what way?" Hyukjae leans forward, bordering in Donghae's space. "Just because I'm a guy doesn't mean I don't get kisses."

 

Donghae clears his throat and Hyukjae leans away, his hand still held up.

 

"Fine. Rematch." Donghae arranges their food away, and he matches Hyukjae's stance. He braces himself, and concentrates on his strength. 

 

Hyukjae raises an eyebrow at him, and their hands slowly clasped around each other. He grins confidently, and Donghae's heart stirs in a way that Hyukjae's day persona can only do to him. Donghae grips Hyukjae's hand in his fist, and he can feel the other's strength as well. He flexes his biceps as he begins to push Hyukjae's hand down, but Hyukjae is holding out well on his own. They concentrate at the game, their teeth gritting and their other arm grabbing the side of the table for assistance. 

 

Hyukjae watches Donghae's handsome features. His eyes are trained on their clasped fists, and his forehead is creased in such a manly way that he begins to get tempted to let him have his way. 

 

But not today. 

 

Hyukjae grunts, and he takes away Donghae's lead on him, and he pushes back until Donghae's arm is nearer to the surface of the table, and the older man is staring at him incredulously. 

"What the hell?" Donghae exclaims, and Hyukjae takes this opportunity and he smacks Donghae's hand on the table. 

 

He abruptly stands up. "I win." 

Donghae stands up as well, unwilling to let Hyukjae go yet. "How did you beat me?" 

Hyukjae smiles cheekily. "Don't you know? I grew up here. I'm farm strong."

Donghae fumes at this. "I'll get back at you."

Hyukjae pats Donghae's cheek daringly. "I think you might."

 

For a moment, Donghae forgets that there are people around them. 

 

"Good night, Donghae," Hyukjae tells him. 

Donghae studies Hyukjae's face, liking that it is just so free and that it doesn't have any other pretense. He thinks that he prefers him this way, instead of going out at day as a girl. He understands that it helps with his uncle's land and their profit, but that's how the world works, doesn't it? Everyone ought to give something to receive something in return. In Hyukjae's case, it is his pride and in a way, his innocence and childhood. Children in this deprived country always get the worse of the situation. Just like Donghae. 

 

"Meet me in the front porch?" Donghae invites him this time. There will be no surprises.

Hyukjae's eyes twinkled, full of humor. "Will I kiss you there?" 

Donghae turns away quickly, reaching for his tray of food. "Don't kiss me, if you don't want to." 

Hyukjae chuckles. "All right, all right." He also takes his tray of food. "Do you do song requests?" 

 

Donghae's ears are starting to redden. What are they doing? It seems like Hyukjae is saying something behind his outward words. 

"See you later," Hyukjae bids him farewell for now and he walks away to head towards the kitchen, his heart soaring that it almost made him dizzy. 

 

//

 

Donghae was humming a song, a straw of hay enclosed by his lips, as he strums his guitar softly. Hyukjae silently plops beside him, gazing at the night sky, where the stars are decorate the sky like a thousand lamps. Hyukjae rests his elbows on his knees, and places his jaw on his hands, listening to Donghae play in his sweet, timbre of a voice. Tonight, he didn't put on any of his disguise. Donghae thought that if Hyukjae will get rid of it, he would feel less uncomfortable, but even without it, he feels another sort of discomfort in his heart, that is similar to the feeling of running. 

He sings through the night, and it leads Hyukjae to sleep. He finds the younger slumping on his shoulder, and Donghae stops. He sets his guitar aside, and adjusts his posture so that Hyukjae is comfortable. 

He is a pleasant weight, and he did not mind the silence that they are sharing. 

 

"You have a beautiful smile," Donghae practices under his breath for future use. "You really do."

 

The front door behind them opens with a creak, and footsteps followed right after. 

 

"Oh, you two," Donghae hears Leeteuk behind him. "It's past midnight."

Donghae turns slightly. "Where is his room?" 

 

"I'll take him from here," Leeteuk offers. "He can be very fussy."

"No, I really don't mind. I can take him up," Donghae says. 

 

Leeteuk raises an eyebrow. "Are you sure?"

Donghae nods. Then, he remembers his guitar. He can just go back for it. "Where is his room?"

"The third floor, turn to your left, and it's the last room to your right," Leeteuk replies. 

 

Donghae nods, and he sets his guitar aside. Then, he scoops the lanky teenager into his arms and lifts him up. 

 

"Good night," Leeteuk chirps. Then, with a warning tone. "Take good care of him."

Donghae nods obediently and he goes up to find Hyukjae's room. 

 

Hyukjae's head fits snugly against his chest, and Donghae pauses for a second to admire his face. With a tiny smile playing on his lips, he slowly ascends up the stairs, careful to watch his step. He observes the cream, white walls filled with vintage framed paintings, liking that it contained the open fields of their country's beautiful lands, or the mountain ranges that roughen the earth on the surface, but they all bring a breath-taking picture when you stand so tiny among them. Anyone will stand in awe, but they will not feel their insignificance.

 

Donghae starts to feel Hyukjae's weight getting heavier in his arms, but fortunately, he arrives on the third floor, and follows Leeteuk's instructions. He leans back a little to support Hyukjae's weight, and then opens his door. Donghae trudges carefully, and spots Hyukjae's four poster bed, thick with blankets and occupied by fluffy pillows. He sees Hyukjae's large vanity, where his wigs and makeup were neatly organized in a line. Near the giant windows of his room, there was a rocking chair and a worn out teddy bear sitting on it. 

 

Donghae lowers Hyukjae on his bed, arranging the blankets and pillows so that he is comfortable and that he doesn't fall off, though he doesn't really know Hyukjae's sleeping habits. 

 

As he is exiting the bedroom, Donghae spots a small picture frame by Hyukjae's bedside table. Out of curiosity, he picks it up, and after studying it, he realizes that it was taken in this same bedroom. A woman is carrying an infant, looking out of the window. She had a pristine face, and Donghae can clearly make out where Hyukjae got his beautiful structured face from. 

Quietly, he sets the picture down and then exits out of the room. 

 

He heads downstairs again to fetch his guitar, and then goes back up to the first floor, heading to his shared room with the other men. Their snores filled the small, humid room, so Donghae opens the windows slightly to let in some air. Then he goes to his tiny bed, and discards of his boots and shirt. He lies on his bed, listening to the other men sleep, but somehow, he hears Hyukjae's playful voice in his ears. There is a lot more to him than he lets on, and despite finding out a startling secret, it doesn't deter him from trying to find out more.

Donghae sleeps peacefully that night, and he wakes up with a clear head, albeit, yawning the sleep out of his system.


	4. Chapter 4

Usually, Donghae would see Hyukjae first thing in the morning. 

By the month's end, he's gotten used to seeing him flaunt around his pale legs under a sundress, floating around from table to table, serving the working men drinks and food. He doesn't miss the way some men oggle at Hyukjae, and for some reason, it makes him unreasonably annoyed. There's an urge to march over to where Hyukjae is, and grab the table cloth to hide him away. 

Today is the first day of a new month, and he doesn't see him.

 

He tries not to make his eyes wander obviously, and even fights the urge to swivel around his seat. After helping some of the men clean up the kitchen by putting the plates on the designated dirty area, he sees Leeteuk examining his surroundings. He has a worried line drawn across his forehead, but it immediately eases when he spots Donghae. He quickly strides over to where he is, and sports an easy smile. 

 

"Good morning," Leeteuk greets, a little awkward. 

"Good morning," Donghae greets. 

 

Leeteuk sighs, and puts a hand on his hip. "Can you go find Hyukjae? He's probably out in the fields again."

"Is something wrong?"

"No...today is his parents' death anniversary, so he goes to seek some time alone. However, sometimes he wanders a bit far," Leeteuk explains. "Last year, he went missing until the next day."

 

Donghae nods. "Why me?"

Leeteuk shrugs. "I think, no matter how much he pushes us away, he just needs someone to go hold his hand."

"And..that's me?" Donghae feels a blush creeping up his neck. 

"Yeah. It's the first time I've seen him be friendly with any of the men here, well, except Sungmin and Kyuhyun, but that's because they are my family."

"Where can I find him?" Donghae asks. "Does he go to any spot in particular?" 

 

Leeteuk shakes his head no. "He just wanders around."

Donghae licks his lips. "Okay. I'll go find him."

Leeteuk sighs in relief. "Thank you."

 

Donghae turns around to walk out of the house, but then remembers that he has a question for Leeteuk. "How did his parents die?"

Leeteuk studies Donghae, who he has known for about three years now. He had a particular face that even Heechul noticed him. "There was an epidemic a few years back. Unfortunately, the two of them did not make it."

Donghae sighs in sadness. Diseases were common in this poor country. His family was a victim of another plague a while back. "I see."

 

Leeteuk pats him on the shoulder. "Go find him and make sure he's safe. We always have a hard time trying to find him."

 

//

 

Donghae surveys the land on the back of Hyukjae's favorite horse, starting from the perimeter of the land. He scans every field, but he doesn't find anything that stood out to him. He goes to the another part of the field where there are tall, yellow grasses that goes up to the horse's legs. Donghae watches as the wind blows by, and it makes the grasses bow to the ground. 

 

He adjusts his straw hat on his head, and he continues on his path. 

 

"Hyukjae," Donghae calls out, feeling like a fool. 

The wind answers, whirling around gently. 

 

The horse trudges up ahead, and he realizes that he is about to leave Heechul's land. 

 

Donghae keeps going, scanning his environment intently. The air is thick with humidity, and it smells too strongly of flowers and leaves.

 

Birds flutter overhead, lined in precise lines of V. The trees rustle in their own language, swaying by a rhythm lost to Donghae. Bees buzzed by, travelling on their own direction. Every piece in nature has some course, but where is Donghae? He's making his way to Hyukjae blindly, and yet, not even this stifling heat will steer him away.

After riding for a while, Donghae hears water rushing. 

 

Donghae pets Hyukjae's horse, and he lowers himself down on the ground. He leads the horse by the riverside, and lets it drink the water, then he finds a suitable rock to tie its reins down. 

Donghae reaches his hands down to the water and brings the cool liquid to his face. He reaches down again to take a sip, and lets out a satisfied sigh. 

 

"Don't tell me that you're following me," a familiar cheeky voice interrupts the pristine mood. 

Donghae immediately stands up, and he finds the source of the voice. Then, he finds a figure by a flat rock a few feet away from him. "No. Leeteuk sent for me." Donghae notices that Hyukjae is dressed in a light cotton shirt and trousers.

"He worries too much," Hyukjae comments and he sits up. 

"He has the right to," Donghae supplies. "He's your family."

 

Hyukjae smiles softly and he shrugs. "How'd you find me?"

"Serendipity?" Donghae answers. 

Hyukjae laughs, his eyes crinkling childishly. 

 

Donghae basks at the sound, and he ends up staring at Hyukjae in wonder. 

 

"Did you feel sorry for me?" Hyukjae asks, approaching Donghae carefully. "Is that why you came to find me?"

Donghae frowns. "No, I came willingly." 

Hyukjae narrows his eyes. "You're very honest," he deduces. 

"I just can't lie to save my life," Donghae says. 

 

Hyukjae bends down, and puts his hand on the cool water of the river. It rushes with a weak current, through tiny pebbles and rocks. Suddenly, he scoops the water up quickly, hitting Donghae on his pants. 

 

"What the?" Donghae exclaims, stepping away. 

 

Hyukjae giggles. 

As revenge, Donghae bends down too, and slaps water to Hyukjae's way. 

 

Hyukjae curses, and he actually pushes Donghae towards the water. 

 

"Yah!" The older man exclaimed. 

The teenager laughs airily, but Donghae shoves water to his path. Hyukjae widens his eyes in excitement when Donghae trudges out of the river towards him, and he is suddenly thrown over his broad shoulder. 

 

"Put me down!" Hyukjae demands, giggling as well. 

"Not a chance!" 

 

Donghae marches into the cold water, and he throws Hyukjae in it. The teengaer shrieks from the cold temperature, but he is laughing and slapping the water around him to ward Donghae away. 

 

Donghae laughs uncontrollably, and that sound coming from him frees up a knot in his chest. 

Hyukjae swims toward him, and suddenly jumps, his arms pulling down Donghae into the water. On instinct, he finds Hyukjae's waist and he circles his arms around it. 

 

Donghae is certain that Hyukjae is trying to drown him, but when he comes up for fresh air, all he can breathe in is Hyukjae's space, and his smile. It was all too much, that it was almost as if nothing had changed. He is still under the water. 

 

"You can let go now," Hyukjae softly says. 

Donghae slowly retreats his arms, his eyes trained on the youth's face. He has a feeling that there was no need to let go. 

 

"Thank you for coming," Hyukjae quietly says. 

Donghae gets an urge to hold his hand right away, but he doesn't, fearing that what he knows will be broken by what he feels.

 

//

 

"Good morning," Hyukjae greets flirtatiously. He leans his hip on the side of where Donghae is eating his breakfast peacefully. The men around Donghae glances at Hyukjae in excitement, but the teenager doesn't pay them any mind.

Donghae slowly glances up, noticing a red, flowery dress on Hyukjae. Today, he has brown hair that goes down to his defined shoulders in curls. He frowns. 

"What?" Hyukjae deadpans, and he crosses his pale arms. 

Donghae shakes his head, and he sets his spoon down to let Hyukjae know that he is all ears. 

"You can have a new task today, if you accept it," Hyukjae announces. 

 

Shindong jabs Donghae on the side harshly to tease him.

Donghae hisses and rubs his side.

 

"I'm going to town today to sell some handmade products," Hyukjae begins. "Leeteuk is busy today, and he cannot come with me. You're the replacement. You in?"

Donghae stares at Hyukjae. "You're going dressed like that?" 

Hyukjae scowls at Donghae, unimpressed. 

"Dude," Kangin whispers scoldingly. "You don't say that to a lady!" 

 

Hyukjae raises an eyebrow. "You better meet me by the stables in time, or you're going to have a miserable time for the rest of your stay here," he threatens. 

Donghae gapes at Hyukjae dumbly. He didn't mean it to sound like he's judging him. He was only asking if Hyukjae is going to go out as his day persona or just as himself, but then again, Donghae has no tact.

"And Donghae?" 

Donghae feels fear creep into his veins. He immediately wants to get on the floor and kneel before him. 

"Respond to me in that way again, and I will break your arm," Hyukjae warns, and he storms away. 

 

Donghae returns to his food, feeling a bit weirded out. Shindong and Kangin gave him disapproving looks. 

 

"What?" Donghae forces out. 

"You're so stupid," Kangin comments. 

Shindong shakes his head. 

 

//

 

Donghae helps Hyukjae with the cart that will carry the items they will be bringing into the nearest town. Hyukjae is still in his daylight disguise, but he is fuming with annoyance every time Donghae gets close to him by accident. Donghae likes spending silent moments with him, but this silent moment is way too different than the other ones. It's making him feel really guilty. 

"I'm sorry," Donghae blurts out before they depart.

Hyukjae raises an eyebrow at him. His floppy hat flaps from the wind. "For what?" 

 

Donghae stares at Hyukjae helplessly. "I'm sorry, okay? For earlier."

Hyukjae's expression eases, but he continues to stare at Donghae, waiting if he is worthy of forgiveness. 

Donghae looks away, and he tugs at his shirt. "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean it in a judgmental way, I was just asking you if you would rather just you know...not dress like a girl, since you're with me?"

 

Donghae bites his lower lip nervously. 

Then, he hears Hyukjae chuckling. "That's the first time I've heard someone say this."

 

Donghae looks back up, and he gawks at the smile Hyukjae is sporting. 

"How about you see it this way?" Hyukjae steps closer to Donghae, and peers at his face. "Everyone knows her, but you only get to know me because we're friends. Don't you worry about me hiding from you, because I'll always be me around you. Okay?"

 

Donghae lets out a small, relieved laugh. They start on their journey, walking alongside each other with synchronized steps. They start to talk about the people in the farm, and the favorite tasks they like to do. Donghae talks about his other experiences on other lands, and he talks about his travels. He's seen the ocean, the mountains, had trekked to wooded areas. He's been through mudplots, and cities, but he admits that he always prefer going to farms and ranches because of the open space. 

Hyukjae listens to Donghae, only pitching in with small exclamations and agreements, and Donghae ends up sharing a lot more. 

 

"When I was younger, the first epidemic striked our country," Donghae starts. "My father lost his job, and we didn't have enough money to buy any medicine. My mother got sick first because she works with patients who are affected. Then, my dad got sick as well. We were thrown into the streets, and my brother and I had to fend for ourselves-there were gangs everywhere, you know? Our parents stayed in a homeless shelter, and told us to go to the next city to find a job, but my brother also got sick, and he died along the way."

Hyukjae looks up at the sky, trying to pull the tears in. "What happened to your parents?"

"They died too. I got there too late," Donghae ends quietly. 

 

Hyukjae inhales the thick, moist air around them. "There was a recent epidemic. I lost my parents to that one," he says quietly. 

The wind rustles the grass, and then shakes the leaves of the trees. 

 

Donghae glances at Hyukjae, and realizes that they are able to understand each other. Donghae takes a deep breath, and he reaches over to take Hyukjae's hand into his. The younger looks at him in surprise, but he doesn't break away. Donghae meets Hyukjae's eyes, and he somehow knew that this was the right move. 

 

//

 

The town that Hyukjae frequents to sell the farm's products is surprisingly lively. It could be mistaken as a city. 

There was a railroad in the middle of the main street, and people filled the bustling streets, going from shop to shop, or busy attending to their businesses. Donghae looks around in wonder. Most of the towns he's been to were quiet and less populated due to people migrating all the time, but this town in particular seems like it is doing well despite the country's economic slump. 

With Hyukjae's hand in his, they navigate through the streets with their horse behind them. 

 

"Um...so where are we going?" Donghae inquires, his neck working to scan his environment. 

"Leeteuk and I usually go to the market, and we just...find a spot..."

 

A peddler passes by, and Hyukjae moves out of the way to let him pass. Children run across their path and almost into Hyukjae, which sends the teenager closer to Donghae's side. Their shoulders touched, and Hyukjae briefly glances at Donghae, who is now watching him intently. 

"This way," Hyukjae tugs at their joined hands, and Donghae follows his lead.

 

They find the market near the townsquare and they start to settle in their spot. Several ladies were shouting over people to get their products advertised, but Hyukjae doesn't do any of those. He lays all the items down-soap, lotion, cotton rolls-and he waits. 

 

"Oh, Eunja!" A lady hurries towards them. 

Two horses, followed by a large coach passes by, rattling against the ground.

"Mrs. Choi," Hyukjae greets amicably. 

 

Donghae watches in amazement, at how quickly and smoothly Hyukjae can put on his day persona. 

 

"Anything new?" Mrs. Choi asks, peering at the items that Hyukjae laid out. 

"Well, here are the handmade lotions that you like," Hyukjae gestures at a section. "No new scents this year though, the depression's hitting us hard."

Mrs. Choi nods, understanding. "All right, I'll buy several of those. Tell me how much the products will cost you, I'm pretty sure my husband can work out a little something," she winks. 

Hyukjae smiles. "Mrs. Choi, I've also been concocting dyes for hair. Would you like to try it?"

 

"Sure, if it means I get to have pretty hair like yours!" Mrs. Choi exclaims. She waits for Hyukjae to wrap her purchases and then she hands over the money to pay. 

"How's Siwon?" Hyukjae asks as he takes the money from her. 

Mrs. Choi shrugs. "We've finally found a match for him." 

Hyukjae nods, his smile faltering a little and Donghae picks up at this. "Well, good luck to him."

Mrs. Choi opens her mouth to bid Hyukjae farewell, but her eyes landed on Donghae. She examines Donghae, from his tanned skin and worn clothes. 

 

Donghae can feel her distate for him, and also for Hyukjae. Mrs. Choi's presence speaks that she is from a higher class, of course, she will carry some judgements. 

 

"Is he your fiance?" She stage-whispers, making a show of covering her mouth.

Hyukjae blinks at this. "What? N-"

"That's great!" She exclaims, sounding too relieved. 

"Mrs. Choi-"

"I will tell Siwon about this. Good luck!" 

 

And with that, she walked away with a great assumption. 

 

When she was out of earshot, Hyukjae was tempted to snatch his wig off and throw it to the ground. 

 

"I'm a fucking man! How long do I have to fucking endure-fuck this shit!" He hisses to himself. "Fuck those nobles! Just because I come from the working class-"

 

"Hyuk?" Donghae interrupts gently. 

 

Hyukjae stops abruptly, and his gaze soften for Donghae. "Yes?"

"Who's Siwon?" He carefully asks. 

Hyukjae rolls his eyes. "Just some noble boy who likes me, and his mother has been trying to keep him away from me."

Donghae looks at him, eyes like an open window to how torn he is feeling inside. 

 

Hyukjae smiles at him, easily reading his face. "He doesn't know my secret." I don't like him, what Hyukjae means to say. 

The anxiety on Donghae's face drains away, and this made Hyukjae smile even wider. 

 

"To be honest, she's a bitch," Donghae comments a little too loudly.

Hyukjae bursts out laughing, and doubles over. "Donghae, someone could hear you! They are well known here!"

"Don't care."

Hyukjae shakes his head, and he was about to say something when a customer comes up. 

 

The smile on his face does not go away.

 

//

 

Hyukjae puts down two glasses of water in between them, while Donghae plays a cheerful song, the beat fast, and the chords uplifting and joyful. Hyukjae watches Donghae the whole time, unable to look away. When Donghae dwindles to a stop, the two of them ended up staring at each other. 

"Thank you," Hyukjae whispers. 

"For what?" 

Hyukjae's eyes go to his forearms, where veins crisscrossed over each other like streams and rivers. "For being my friend..." Unconsciously, he scoots closer. "For...accompanying me today..."

 

Donghae moves the glasses of water away from them, and he sets his guitar aside. With a courage that makes his heart jump wildly in its place, he gently takes Hyukjae's hand into his, and interlocks their fingers. 

Hyukjae doesn't pull away, instead, he moves even closer, until their shoulders are touching. 

"For holding my hand..." Hyukjae finishes shyly.

 

Donghae feels himself blush too. He likes to think that he's a tough man, that not a lot can sway him off his feet because this damn world had hardened him, but just hearing Hyukjae, just feeling his silky-like hand, it makes Donghae want to scream on top of the highest mountain. Forget Hyukjae's Eunja, forget the dresses, and the wigs-although they don't take away from who he is-Donghae accepts Hyukjae as he is. Whoever he decides to be, Donghae is pretty sure that Hyukjae will remain consistent with him. 

And Donghae will make sure to do the same. 


	5. Chapter 5

June comes with pouring rain. 

Hyukjae watches the his family farm get drenched by the consistent, harsh downfall of rain, feeling a bit sad because he knows that their animals get scared of changes in nature easily, and that sometimes, their crops won't make it through if this keeps going. He rocks on his rocking chair, where he knows his mother had often sat on to coax him to sleep. 

The rain makes him sad because it reminds him of his parents too much. It keeps reminding him of his loss. 

 

Someone knocks on his door, and it creaks open. Heechul shows up with a steamy mug on one hand. 

 

Hyukjae's uncle grins at him, and crosses the room to hand him the hot chocolate. 

"Here you go, kid," Heechul says. "I know how much you get upset at this kind of weather."

Hyukjae shrugs. "It's not bad. I'm just worried about our produce."

 

Heechul purses his lips in thought, as if he's contemplating of revealing a secret, but decides against it and pats Hyukjae on the shoulder. "What's the deal between you and that Lee Donghae guy, hm?"

Hyukjae gave his uncle a brief, sideways glance. "Weren't you just telling Leeteuk that you really like Donghae? That you prefer him over any other worker and that you literally want to adopt him as your own?" 

Heechul raises a knowing eyebrow. "What's it to you?"

"Nothing," Hyukjae quickly takes a sip from the mug, but then jerks away. "Ah!" He shouts. "It's hot!"

 

Heechul rolls his eyes dramatically and smacks the back of his nephew's head. "Idiot," he says fondly. "Sungmin's fiance is coming soon, so despite the storm, the work in my land does not stop. Go find something to do, you lazy brat. Prepare her room or something."

Hyukjae tilts his head back. "Won't she just sleep with Sungmin?"

Heechul smacks Hyukjae's forehead. "No. We're keeping it traditional."

Hyukjae fakes a gasp. "You? Traditional?" He widens his eyes mockingly. "Since when?"

"Since Leeteuk believes in superstitions." Heechul runs a hand through his unruly hair. "You do know, you were an accident?"

Hyukjae chokes on his chocolate milk, the liquid spurting out of his nose comically. He coughs violently, and Heechul whacks him hard on the back. "What?!" Hyukjae splutters. 

 

"I'm kidding!" Heechul laughs. "It's just you were born before your parents' ceremonial wedding-they just declared themselves married and made you. Your father was a seasonal worker so he had to move around a lot. Your mom stayed here to raise you."

Hyukjae rolls his eyes. "How come they never told me?"

"Because, it doesn't matter. They love you very much, regardless."

 

Another knock interrupts their conversation, and the door opens, revealing Donghae, with two, steaming mugs in his hands.

Hyukjae grins, while Donghae stops, looking like a deer caught in a trap.

 

"Wrong room," Donghae says as an excuse. "Sorry."

 

Heechul grabs the mug that is in Hyukjae's hand, and he rolls his eyes. "If I'd known, I wouldn't make this extra effort, I have things to do, Hyukjae."

Hyukjae laughs, and stands from his rocking chair. "I'm going to go after him."

Heechul raises an eyebrow, but he chooses not to comment. 

 

Hyukjae shrugs and then he strides out of the room to catch up to Donghae, who is now hurrying towards the steps. 

"Hey," Hyukjae calls.

 

Donghae turns, looking at him with wide eyes. "I, um, thought you'd like hot chocolate? Leeteuk told me you like hot chocolate when it's raining a-and I saw that-"

Hyukjae takes one of the mugs from Donghae's hand gently. "Thank you."

Donghae gawks at Hyukjae a little longer, and then he shakes himself out of his stupor. Get it together, Donghae. 

Hyukjae gestures towards the stairs. "Wanna go sit by one of the salons?"

"Wouldn't the others be there?" 

Hyukjae smirks. "I can tell them to get out."

Donghae rolls his eyes. "That's rude."

Hyukjae chuckles. "Look who's talking! You badmouth a lot of people in front of their faces, that's more rude!"

"But you're a kid! I can do whatever I want as an adult!"

"I practically own this house! And I'm almost an adult!"

"Tell that to the mirror."

"Is that suppose to be a compliment?" Hyukjae smirks, his eyebrows raising cheekily.

"I was being sarcastic," Donghae replies.

 

"Serious, tough, Lee Donghae knows sarcasm?" Hyukjae mocks.

Donghae couldn't help laughing at anything Hyukjae says, even though the words are meant to tease him. He used to not like being called out on his crap, but with Hyukjae, it's easier to accept it. Maybe because he does it so endearingly and it always bring a smile on his face. He finds it hard to get angry at the latter.

 

I'm not making sense, Donghae thinks to himself.

 

He follows Hyukjae down the steps, and as they descend, they can hear the men in the kitchen or in one of the living rooms, laughing and chattering. Some are helping with clearning the house, or some decided to just catch up on sleep or learning. Hyukjae leads him into one of the salons that are in the front of the house, where only a few are occupying the couches decorated with roses and their thorny stems. Hyukjae takes a seat by one of the couches near the big windows, which provides a wide view of Heechul's land. 

From here, they can see the barn and the stables, the strawberry fields and other crop fields, and also the tiny fences that border the land. 

It would have been a peaceful sight, if it weren't for the rain.

 

Hyukjae takes a sip from the hot chocolate Donghae made, his eyes never leaving the older man's face. 

 

Donghae's gaze burns more than the way the hot liquid can scald him. It's like he's trying to speak a thousand sentences, yet they only swim into the surface with a blunt word or two. Hyukjae wants him to speak his mind, but there's something wonderful about his silent presence. It's like having an umbrella under the rain. You know that you'll get wet regardless, but you're safe no matter what.

It's making him change his mind about the rain. 

 

"So, after your work here is done, where are you heading next?" Hyukjae asks, setting his mug on his thigh. 

Donghae was finally able to look away, and he trains his eyes outside. "I have an employer that will take me in the city. They're willing to have me for the winter."

Hyukjae sucks in one of his cheeks and chews on it, thinking. "That's good. There's nothing here for you in winter anyway."

Donghae narrows his eyes. Again, it seems like Hyukjae is trying to say something more to him. The younger talks a lot that it hides the meaning of his words. To think about it, Hyukjae does a lot of hiding from him. "I could probably stay until early fall, you know, for Sungmin's wedding."

"Yeah, for Sungmin's wedding..."

 

Donghae pins Hyukjae in his spot. He is tempted to push him against the couch, to touch his face, and to finally, maybe-

 

Hyukjae straightens in his seat when the whole world grumbled, and the sky grew dark in one second. He munches on his teeth, his eyes darting nervously. As the sky seemed to have a raging battle of guns and bombs, and as the world alternated in light and blackness, Donghae reaches over to hold Hyukjae's pale hand. He gently runs his thumb over it, his calloused skin against his smooth one. 

 

The gesture makes Hyukjae wonder if holding hands is just how far they're going to get. 

Hyukjae squeezes Donghae's hand. He's okay with that. 

 

//

 

"No, no, no," Hyukjae murmurs in panic. 

 

The storm rages outside, and Hyukjae had went down to the stables to check on the horses. As he was making his way towards Sandy, he notices that she was not there at all. He walks around frantically even though he knows that Sandy will not be anywhere near him. A sob gets stuck in his throat, and his heart drops to his stomach. 

 

"Hyuk?" He hears Donghae call for him softly. The rain patters violently outside. 

Hyukjae couldn't help but burst out in tears, and he immediately feels Donghae wrapping him in his arms. 

 

"Hey, hey, hey," Donghae murmurs against his head. "What's wrong?"

Hyukjae clutches Donghae's sides, not quite hugging him yet. "Sandy-she's gone!" He cries. Donghae's hand come up to the back of his head, and Hyukjae buries his face into Donghae's chest. 

"We'll find her," Donghae comforts. "She couldn't have gone far." He pats Hyukjae's back, and then lets go of Hyukjae, in fear of doing too much. 

 

"I'm gonna get the horses ready," Hyukjae declares, sniffing a little. 

Donghae looks at the storm. "I don't think you should go. It's raining really hard."

Hyukjae glares at Donghae. "She's my horse. I'm going."

Donghae licks his lips. "It's dangerous."

"I'm going," Hyukjae asserts. 

 

The two of them stared at each other, having a stand off. As usual, Donghae loses. 

 

"Fine," Donghae says. 

Hyukjae takes one more look at Donghae's face, and then he turns around to grab the saddles and reins. "Don't ever tell me what to do."

Donghae sighs wearily, trying to think when did he ever let the younger have this much of a hold on him that he shuts up for him senseless. "Got it."

 

//

 

As the rain continuously beat them down, Donghae follows the stubborn Hyukjae, who is desperately calling out for his horse. He applauds Hyukjae for being stubborn and for being determined to find his horse, and he also feels very proud of him for standing up to his decision. The more Donghae spends time with Hyukjae, the more he is compelled to follow his lead, and he felt relieved for some reason. Even if Hyukjae leads them to danger, Donghae would not mind standing beside him. He has been a wandering man, always moving from place to place without getting attached to anything, and because of that, he always felt so alone and without direction. 

With Hyukjae, however...

 

Donghae checks the skies. It doesn't give any sign of letting up, and though he is all for Hyukjae's leadership, it will get dangerous. He doesn't know much about the layout of the land, but it does have many trees. If the ground gets saturated enough, a flash flood may happen. 

 

"Hyukjae," Donghae calls out. 

 

Hyukjae ignores him, and keeps on going. 

"Hyuk, it's going to get dangerous! I'm sure she will go back!"

 

Hyukjae's horse suddenly rears back, and lightning flashed before their eyes. The path in front of them is obscured by soil, trees and running water. 

 

"Fuck!" Hyukjae cursed. He pulls his horse's reins to steady it, and luckily, he manages to get away. "Go back!" 

 

Hyukjae races past him, and Donghae follows. The ground beneath them is soft and watery, and Hyukjae feels like his horse is going to slip any moment now. The rain in front of him makes it hard to see ahead, so the two of them are going back towards Heechul's land blindly. 

When they have returned to the stables, Hyukjae gets off the horse he was on, and he slumps to the ground, tired and wet, and all kinds of upset. 

 

"I hate the rain!" He exclaims. He resists the urge to cry. 

Donghae watches Hyukjae with a heavy feeling settling on his heart, because he wants to cheer him up no matter what-it was always Hyukjae bringing a smile to his face and he can't even do the same. The mere sight of him breaking down is enough to bring tears to his eyes. Donghae takes one step closer to him, too tired to fight the small voice inside him that he shouldn't do this, that it's wrong and that he's younger...that Donghae himself has a grueling life. 

But it's a small voice, and that he's too tired. 

 

He crouches down in front of Hyukjae, and slowly stood him up, then he fully wraps his arms around Hyukjae. He feels a peaceful sigh leave his mouth when Hyukjae's arms around his torso tightened. Hyukjae fits just right in his arms, despite their similar heights. With Hyukjae burying his face on his neck, he feels tempted to lift his face up to him, but just thinking about of doing it makes him blush and make him feel giddy, like he had too much coffee. 

"She's a gift from my dad," Hyukjae mutters. "I already lost them, I can't lose her too. I can't lose anybody, I'm tired, Donghae."

 

Donghae leans his head on Hyukjae's. "You're not really losing anyone. They're always in your memories, in your heart. Just because you can't see them or feel them doesn't mean they left you."

 

Hyukjae rolls his eyes, but it doesn't have any malice in it. "Why are you such a softie..."

Donghae chuckles, and Hyukjae finds that the way it makes his chest rumble is pleasant. 

 

"I really mean it, Hyukjae."

"Yeah, yeah, shut up."

 

//

 

Hyukjae takes a candle out to the porch, while Donghae sits on one of the steps, strumming his guitar gently. The rain had thankfully stopped, and the night smells of fresh mist. The humid thickness in the air is gone, and Hyukjae takes in a deep breath to pull in the smell of the rain. Hyukjae looks at the dark sky, unadorned with its usual lights, and then at the broad shoulders of Donghae that seem to slump diagonally. He takes a match and lights the candle, a sort of offering to the sky, to give it light again so that Hyukjae can throw in a wish. 

He sets the lit candle by the rail of the porch, and then sits by Donghae, a slight frown creasing his forehead. 

 

"I'm sorry," Hyukjae says. 

Donghae smirks. "For what?"

"You know...earlier..."

"Nah," Donghae says. "Don't apologize for that. Don't apologize for being yourself. Didn't we agree to keep it real?"

 

Hyukjae smiles softly. "For a really single-minded guy, you sure do know what to say in the right moment."

Donghae leans away, looking at him with disbelief. "Did you just call me dumb?"

"You are dumb!" 

 

Donghae fake scowls and playfully shoves Hyukjae, who shoves him back. Hard. 

 

"Hey, I did not push you that hard!" 

"Sorry, you push me, I push back twice as hard." 

 

Donghae chuckles, amused. He wants to say something that will befit the moment, but he's afraid of saying the wrong thing, or worse, say the most honest thing that has been running through his head.

 

"Do you think she'll come back?" Hyukjae says quietly. "Poor sweetheart, she must have been scared of the storm." 

Donghae studies the sharp line of his jaw. "Of course, she will. Everyone must come home at some point."

 

Hyukjae raises an eyebrow, teasing. "How much will you charge for this fortune, oh great, wise-"

"Shut up, you're so annoying."

"You're more annoying." 

"Well, you're the most annoying." 

"You're the king of being annoying."

"You're the god of being annoying."

"Takes one to know one."

 

Donghae shoves him on the shoulder. Hyukjae tumbles on the other side, but he gets back up immediately and tackles Donghae down, his fingers clutching on the collar of his shirt. 

 

"Mind you, that is worn and susceptible to tearing," Donghae warns, his thick fingers hovering over Hyukjae's slim ones.

Hyukjae only gives him a ghost of a smile. "Oh, shut the fuck up." 

 

The two of them struggled against each other, playfully trying to wrestle one another. Hyukjae let's out a strangled laugh as he manages to flip Donghae on his back again. His forearms are now resting on his chest, and their faces close to each other. 

 

"I can actually tear your shirt apart," Hyukjae jokes.

"Are you going to replace it?"

"I could. Aren't you already working for it? I'll take it out on your pay." 

Donghae rolls his eyes, and he lets a hand wander to the side of Hyukjae's head. "I guess life can't be fair anywhere." 

Hyukjae chuckles, and realizing the position they are in, he rolls off and lands beside Donghae. "I guess so, too."

Donghae holds his breath as he reaches for Hyukjae fingers, but Hyukjae turns towards him, their faces closer than ever. 

 

"Sing me something new," Hyukjae whispers. He leans his head on Donghae's shoulder and he scoots closer until he can feel his warm body.

 

Donghae's skin tingled from the proximity, but there was nothing better to compare this with. 

 

Donghae starts of humming, and when he finally got to some words, Hyukjae had dozed off to sleep, and Donghae stays still, in fear of disturbing the magic that covered them in this moment. 

 

"You're so beautiful, Hyukjae," Donghae whispers. "I forget to tell you because you take my breath away every single time."

 

The quiet sky speculates, the only witness to Donghae's confession. Donghae lets the silence rule over him, and he feels his eyes growing heavier until he can barely remember if he's actually blinking or sleeping, but then he hears Hyukjae's soft voice. 

 

Or maybe it was a dream. 

 

I think I might be falling for you... Lee Donghae...


	6. Chapter 6

Hyukjae appears often as himself outside the house, and even in the morning. Sometimes he'll dress as her to keep up appearances, but as the month of June progresses, Donghae sees him more often. Of course, he also had to avoid him at times because he never gets any work done when he just appears out of nowhere and jokes around with him. Hyukjae also pays more attention to him, saving an extra piece of bread or meat for him, and pours his drink at night. 

Sometimes, when he gets drunk, Hyukjae would be the one to help him to his room. 

 

Luckily, he wasn't a talkative drunk, but unfortunately for Hyukjae, he couldn't control his urge to just touch him. He would grab at Hyukjae's arm, and even get the confidence to pull him closer to his body. He would press his face on Hyukjae's soft neck that smells of the sun and the grass, and he would fucking giggle. 

Hyukjae would push him back to his bed and scold him, but Donghae finds his annoyed expression really cute on him. 

 

"Come on, Donghae, stop," Hyukjae protests, as Donghae buries his face into his stomach. And Hyukjae is ticklish in the stomach. He resists the urge to burst out laughing.

 

The men that are using the same room as Donghae are starting to come in, and they laugh at the spectacle before them. 

"He really can't hold his alcohol!" One of them says. 

 

Hyukjae sighs wearily. "Unfortunately." Donghae is tugging at him, pulling him into the bed. Hyukjae panics at this, and untangles himself out of Donghae's grip. 

"No!" Donghae exclaims childishly, his face red. 

Hyukjae pushes him into the bed, and Donghae stays there like that, giggling. 

 

"Say, where's your sister?" One of the men on Hyukjae's left asks. 

Hyukjae glances at him, a bit annoyed. "Around."

"Tell her we miss her," he says, rubbing his face with a clean towel. 

"Yeah, we miss having her pretty face," another sighs. "She's a beauty, for real. If I only had the means, I would have her as my wife."

"Speak for yourself, she wouldn't like your stinky face."

"What makes you think you have a chance with her?"

"What makes you think she'll even glance at you?"

"Well, damn, do you like her too? I bet she's already screwing around here, that's why we haven't seen her."

"Yeah! She's got plenty of choices already!"

"Shut up, her brother's here!"

"I'm sure he needs to know! If she really is screwing around, then her chances of getting married will be slim. No one wants a whore for a wife."

 

Hyukjae tightens a fist, ready to blow a fuse, to apprehend these judgemental men, but a startling deep voice washes his anger away.

"Shut the hell up," Donghae growls. 

Hyukjae's head immediately snaps to Donghae in surprise. 

The man tries to sit up, but then he gives up because he felt too dizzy. 

 

Someone chuckles. "Come to think of it...we've been hearing that she favors you, Donghae. Is it you she's fucking around with?"

"Who said anything about fucking?" Hyukjae snaps. This conversation is getting carried away. He clenches his fist. If he could hit anyone, now would be the best time.

 

"You have to be careful, Donghae," someone warns. "When you leave, she'll probably take up another man."

"Yeah, your heart will be broken."

 

Hyukjae rolls his eyes, and leaves the room. Stupid men. 

 

//

 

Hyukjae avoids Donghae at breakfast, and he goes straight to the stables. His horse is still missing, and that's just one more thing to add on the overwhelming feelings his heart has been carrying for the last few days. Maybe he brought this to himself. It was fun messing with Donghae at first because he always seem so serious. Not to mention that Donghae had an infatuation with her. However, it's not for games anymore, he ended up desiring Donghae as more than a friend. Hyukjae knows by now that Donghae has a good heart, that he wouldn't just be friends with him for some twisted motive, but he can't help feel insecure when most of the men Donghae has been around seem to think that women are just for their enjoyment. 

And he's not even one. Just the image he portrays to them clouds their senses.

He's been lucky that no one has dared to touch him while he's wearing his day persona, but it could be any day that he finds himself in a vulnerable position. 

 

Hyukjae takes a strand of his dark brown hair wig, and straightens it. Dressing up a girl was fun in the beginning, when he and his mother would do it together. His mother knew a lot about fashion and makeup, and because Hyukjae was a shy boy, she became his bestfriend. She tried new looks on him, and Hyukjae would be so enthusiastic about it. He gained his confidence through this. His mother never forced him to act like a boy, she encouraged him that he could be anything he wants. 

Now that his parents are gone, this part of him seems more like a burden. He wants to get rid of her, but he couldn't because he knows that the men really like her and it benefits his family. When he goes to town, people flock to her, because she's beautiful, and that the products that Hyukjae himself made is so much better looking on a girl than a man.

To think about it, didn't Donghae go here just to see her? 

 

Hyukjae leans his head on the wall bordering Sandy's stable. Outside, he could hear the men working. 

 

"Hey," Donghae greets, stepping into the stables. 

Hyukjae looks up when he hears his presence, and his face lights up with happiness. 

 

Beside Donghae, is his horse, safe and in one piece. 

"Oh my god!" Hyukjae shouts. 

 

Donghae grins, sweaty and grimy, and still a little hangover, but it's worth every effort to see Hyukjae smile like this. 

Hyukjae barrels straight into Donghae and throws his arms on his neck to hug him. Donghae turns his head slightly to look at Hyukjae in awe, and then he wraps his arms around his slim waist that he couldn't get enough of. 

 

"Oh my god, thank you," Hyukjae cries, hugging the life out of Donghae. "Thank you, thank you!"

"I can't breathe!" Donghae gasps. 

Hyukjae pulls away immediately, wide eyes staring at Donghae in amazement. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" Then he turns to Sandy. "You bad girl! Don't do that again!" 

 

Hyukjae hugs his horse, but then he hugs Donghae again. 

 

But then, he remembers what happened last night in Donghae's room. He lets go of Donghae and punches him on his shoulder. Hard. 

 

Donghae groans and doubles over, holding his shoulder. "What the hell?" He cries. 

"Did you say something about me last night?" Hyukjae snaps. 

Donghae winces and he dares to meet Hyukjae's fierce eyes. "What?"

"I said, did you-"

"I heard what you said, but I don't know what you mean!" Donghae interrupts quickly. 

Hyukjae stomps on Donghae's toes. 

 

"Ow! Hyukjae!" Donghae protests. 

"You and your men talk!" 

"What?" Donghae whines. 

 

Hyukjae places a hand on his hip. "If you talk shit about me, I will break your arm."

"I swear I don't! I don't say anything!" 

Hyukjae nods, accepting this for now, because he had seen how Donghae reacted last night. "Okay."

Donghae stares at him warily. "Okay?"

"Yes. Okay. I trust you."

 

Donghae sees the slight frown on Hyukjae's face, and he knows that something is bothering Hyukjae, but he doesn't ask because he feels that Hyukjae will just say something else. Hyukjae is not the kind of person to say something immediately, he takes his time to muster his words. So Donghae waits for the right time-though he's been waiting for all kinds of things. Like a puppy finding an owner, he keeps getting his hopes up for a reward.

 

"Wanna go to town?" Hyukjae asks. "I mean, I know that you're working and all, and attendance is important-"

"I will go to town with you," Donghae says. 

"Really?" Hyukjae studies Donghae's face, and his sincerity is clear as always. "I'll tell Heechul you're with me. I need to shop for some stuff."

"Meet you here in a few?"

Hyukjae smiles. "Okay."

 

//

 

Donghae is still so surprised to find the town booming. They weren't near huge cities or even the sea, but this town is very successful. People are clothed in imports from other countries, and there is a train that goes through the town. The businesses are open and people flock to them, and Donghae gets an idea that if there's nothing for him out there anymore, maybe he can find work here and be closer to Hyukjae. He glances at the younger beside him, his floppy hat covering his small face from the sun. As they walk and dodged people, Donghae feels his long, slender fingers twine with his, and he smiles like he had just won a card game.

 

"What are we buying?" 

"Clothes, sewing kits, maybe newspapers to see what's going on with the world," Hyukjae says. He adjusts his hat over his face.

Donghae leans in closer. "You don't really know right?" He teases. He sort of figures that Hyukjae asking him to come to town without bringing anything with him is just another way for them to spend time with each other, but he's also afraid of jumping into conclusions. 

Hyukjae leans away and gives him an annnoyed look. "Sungmin's future wife is coming soon, I'm in charge of making sure that she is comfortable."

Donghae grins. "Okay, princess. I'm at your service."

"If you call me princess again, I will really break your arm."

"With those puny, stick arms?" Donghae teases again. 

Hyukjae grips his hand, and suddenly, he twists Donghae's arm behind his back. 

 

"OW!" Donghae howls. Bystanders start to glance at them. 

"My god, what is wrong with you?" Hyukjae hisses. 

Donghae squints his eyes shut in pain. "Ow, ow, let go!"

"Hm, serious, tough Lee Donghae is in pain?" Hyukjae says in a low, sadistic tone.

Donghae tries to even his breath. "Why are you like this?" He whines. 

 

"Eunja?" 

 

Hyukjae straightens and he whirls around to find Choi Siwon behind them, with his tailored, gentleman suit and his handsome dimples. He lets go of Donghae who stumbles forward, but he immediately regains his footing. 

 

Siwon's eyes go to Donghae, but he dismisses him almost immediately. "Mother told me you're engaged-"

Hyukjae almost laughs at this misunderstanding, but Donghae steps forward. "She is."

 

Siwon's eyes bulge. "I guess, that's you."

Hyukjae glances at Donghae, amused at how he is reacting. 

 

Donghae swallows a lump, and his reckless self spits out the first thing that came to his mind. "Yes."

Siwon sighs, and he pinches the bridge of his nose. "Well, I couldn't expect more from an orphaned girl."

 

Donghae bristles. He does not care if Siwon and his family are well known in this town and that they are filthy rich. No one talks badly about Hyukjae. He walks forward, and snatches him by the collar. Even though Siwon was probably a head taller than him and younger, he tugs the man down and meets his eyes. 

"Don't talk about her like that."

 

"Or what?" Siwon's eyes go to the side, where a bunch of men are already standing in alert. They were just sitting and minding their own business a few seconds ago. 

 

Donghae's mind goes on alert mode. This is not normal. Now he understands why the town is booming in a country plunged into depression. It's doing better than a city, and Donghae has seen places that are divided by territories, swarming with gang members.

 

"Just don't," Donghae growls, and he pushes Siwon back.

 

Hyukjae tries to hide the smile that is about to come up on his features, fighting the spread of his lips into a curve. His heart jumps when Donghae turns back and snatches his hand. They walk away in a hurry and when they are out of sight, Hyukjae pushes Donghae to an alley, and he presses his body closer to him. Donghae's back meets a brick wall. He has nowhere to go.

 

"What are you doing?" Donghae whispers in a rushed tone. 

Hyukjae covers Donghae's eyes with his hand, knowing that his intense stare would make him melt to his knees. 

 

"Hyukjae?" Donghae calls nervously. 

"Shh," Hyukjae softly says, and he leans forward to peck Donghae on the lips, taking his time. He presses his lips on Donghae's experimentally, pulling back occasionally to examine them. 

 

"Hyukjae," Donghae murmurs, a hand going to his waist. He squeezes the portion of skin under his palm, and he sighs when Hyukjae kisses him again. Every peck is making his skin feel hot, and he wants nothing but to push Hyukjae back to the other wall and ravish him with kisses, but at the same time, he wants to slide down to the floor and hyperventilate.

 

When he doesn't feel Hyukjae's lips anymore, he reaches up to slowly take Hyukjae's hand away from his eyes. He sees the younger looking distraught, and Donghae swoons. Everything about him, even when he's angry or crying, when he's sulking or annoyed, he still finds him beautiful. He finds him beautiful when his eyebrows would raise in his bossy way, when his jaw would stiffen because he's being stubborn. 

And he's tired, so tired of holding back. The more he tries to put a cap on his feelings, he ends up drowning in it, and it washes over him, stronger than ever.

 

"You're underage you know," Donghae jokes to lighten the suffocating feeling coming over him. 

Hyukjae rolls his eyes. "Please. We're only a few years apart."

Donghae chuckles, and he pulls Hyukjae closer to his body. "Still."

 

Hyukjae pouts, and Donghae almost catches them. 

 

"When you said I'm beautiful, was that for me, or her?" Hyukjae asks, eyes averting. 

"All of you," Donghae replies, almost running out of breath. Why did he suddenly get so asthmathic? "You, her, when you laugh, when you're scolding me...You're always beautiful."

 

Hyukjae laughs lowly. 

 

"I'm really not kidding," Donghae said and finally, he leans forward to capture Hyukjae's mouth with his. His hands go up to his neck, holding him there, and then framing his face. He steals Hyukjae's breath away, a kind of revenge for making him so dumbfounded before him. 

 

//

 

Late nights on the front porch are spent kissing, with cicadas and crickets in the background. The lights of the house are dark, indicating that its occupants are asleep. An owl would hoot occasionally, while Hyukjae is pressed flush against Donghae's torso, tempted to roam that muscular body, but he doesn't. Not yet, anyways. 

"We should go," Hyukjae whispers against Donghae's hot, open mouth. 

"Hmm, no," Donghae slightly whines.

 

"Your roommates already think you're fucking me, don't add to their delusion that I keep you on my bed," Hyukjae bluntly says. "Go to sleep."

"Okay," Donghae says, and he closes his eyes right in front of Hyukjae. 

 

Hyukjae lightly slaps Donghae's cheek. "Not here, you idiot. In our respective rooms."

Donghae opens one eye and grins cheekily. "Really, I'm surprised you're not abashed that people talk smack about you."

Hyukjae presses his fingers lightly against Donghae's stomach, and lets it linger down. "Why? Won't spoken words become prophecy?" He smirks. 

 

Donghae rolls away from Hyukjae and he sits up. "Okay, kiddo. Let's not get carried away."

Hyukjae shrugs. "Putting me in my place, huh? Wasn't it you who didn't want to go back?" 

 

"We can kiss," Donghae says in the same tone that he had used when he told Hyukjae that they can be friends. At this moment, he can tell that Hyukjae is amused now. 

The younger only chuckles and he sits up too. "Come on, accompany me to my room."

"Yes, my princess."

 

Hyukjae elbows Donghae when he comes to stand behind him. "Don't forget that I can break your arm."

"Yeah, yeah. You just love inflicting pain on me, you sadistic brat."

"Probably." Hyukjae laughs. "You're so easy to tease." 

 

Donghae chuckles and he follows Hyukjae up to the third floor, and up to the door which will open to Hyukjae's bedroom. 

 

"This is where we kiss goodnight," Donghae tells Hyukjae, his eyes smiling. He reaches over to open the door of Hyukjae's bedroom.

"Or where I pull you inside so we can continue that kiss," Hyukjae suggests, leaning forward because he knows that Donghae is easily tempted by him. 

Donghae rolls his eyes. "Well, nevermind. Goodnight."

 

Hyukjae closes his eyes, expecting a kiss, but he is greeted by air. He takes a peek and he sees Donghae walking away. 

 

"Watch your back, Lee Donghae," Hyukjae calls. "I'll get back at you."

 

Despite the aloofness Donghae is successful at displaying, his heart is thundering like crazy inside his chest. He can't believe he was able to resist those swollen lips, but he knows that if he didn't, he might even give in to Hyukjae; he will be willing to be pulled in inside that bedroom. 

 

Hyukjae shuts his door, and he leans his back against it. He closes his eyes in giddiness, and his fingers go up to his mouth, where Donghae had pressed his tingling kisses there that left him light-headed. 

Maybe his revenge for Donghae for not kissing him goodnight can involve not kissing him tomorrow at all. Although it can also make him long for it, Hyukjae is a patient man, and good things always come for those who wait. 

 

Hyukjae chuckles and he dives into his bed. He stares at the ceiling, his thoughts filled with Donghae only. Donghae had told him he was beautiful, not for anything materialistic, but because he was himself. Other people had come and go, but no one really bothered to get to know him and see through him. Donghae was the only one who made an effort, who had the heart to get over his assumptions. 

Hyukjae's eyes close, but he can't get the feeling of Donghae's skin over him pass. His body heats and he's left with a craving of being held by Donghae. 

 

"Oh you," Hyukjae whispers, giggling a bit. He goes to sleep imagining Donghae's strong, tanned arms around him. 

Maybe next week, he can get him to do that.


	7. Chapter 7

"She's here!" Hyukjae exclaims one day in July. 

 

Sungmin rushes to the window, and he follows Hyukjae down the hill when they see carriages coming up the path towards the white house on top of the hill. Hyukjae waves excitedly at the foot of the hill, jumping up and down beside Sungmin as they wait for the carriages to arrive. Finally, the first carriage stoppped, and a fair woman steps out. 

 

"Saeun noona!" Hyukjae shouts. 

Sungmin runs to her first, and catches her in his arms. She laughs out loud as she embraces her soon to be husband. "I missed you too," she exclaims. 

 

Sungmin buries his face into her neck, inhaling her sweet perfume and then he kisses her cheek. "It's been way too long," he says, beholding her in his arms. 

"I'm here, right?" Her eyes crinkled joyfully. 

 

Hyukjae waits for his turn to embrace Saeun, and when he does, he hugs her tightly. "I missed you!!" 

Saeun giggles. "I see you're still as cute!"

Sungmin scoffs. 

 

Saeun ignores him, and grins at Hyukjae excitedly. "I bought us new dresses to try on! And more beauty products, I think they will suit you!" 

"Oh yey!"

"Yeah, let's go!" 

 

The two walks up the hill, leaving Sungmin behind in disbelief. 

 

"Yah! Hyukjae!" Sungmin shouts. "She's my fiance!"

Hyukjae sticks out his tongue mockingly. 

 

//

 

"I haven't seen you all day," Donghae says as Hyukjae plops down beside him at his usual table with Shindong and Kangin at dinner. 

 

Hyukjae grins mysteriously. "Well, Saeun noon-unnie finally came!"

Donghae raises an eyebrow, and he chuckles. He pats his head, and ruffles the red haired wig that Hyukjae is still sporting. "I see you finally came out for dinner," Donghae comments in code. 

"Brother's too tired," Hyukjae replies, understanding what Donghae means. 

 

Shindong leans over the table to address Hyukjae. "So are you two together now?"

Hyukjae chuckles and glances at Donghae, who is now blushing and playing with his food like a kid. 

 

"I guess you can say it like that," Hyukjae replies. 

Shindong leans back to study the two of them. "You two are so cute!" He exclaims. "Congratulations!"

 

Hyukjae feels himself blush, and under the table, Donghae links their fingers together. 

 

"Congratulations?" Kangin says too loudly since he wasn't listening to the conversation, catching the other men's attention. "Are we having a double wedding this fall?"

"What?" Donghae gasps, desperately talking with his eyes to warn Kangin to be quiet. 

 

"Oh my god!" Kangin raises his beer and holds it up. 

"No, no, hyung!" Donghae splutters. 

 

"My dear brother," Kangin announces. "Is going to get married! Cheers!"

The men raised their glasses and cheered. 

 

At this time, Sungmin and Saeun walks in the dining room, mystified at the sudden excited reaction of the men. 

 

Donghae wants to bury himself underground. "Ugh, Kangin hyung! You heard wrong!"

Hyukjae laughs. "Yeah, we're not getting married," he firmly says as if he's sure of it. 

 

Donghae glances at Hyukjae, because this whole situation is getting confusing. Is marriage even in their agenda along the way? Would Hyukjae even want to marry him? Or someone else? Is he even considering, despite that it's too early for them? Can they even get married?

 

"It's a misunderstanding," Hyukjae confirms. 

Kangin cringes. "Ah, sorry. I jumped the gun."

"It's okay," Donghae says, feeling a bit confused as to why he feels a bit dismayed.

 

Hyukjae looks around, and he takes a spoonful of Donghae's food. "Can I do this?" 

Donghae turns his face to Hyukjae. "What?" 

Hyukjae gestures at the spoon, and raises it towards Donghae's mouth. 

 

"Okay..." Donghae leans over and opens his mouth, but Hyukjae takes the spoonful of food to his mouth. 

Hyukjae munches and hums in satisfaction. 

"Really?" Donghae whines. 

 

Hyukjae opens his mouth to laugh, but he ends up choking on his food. 

 

Shindong watches the two of them, a bit annoyed. "Just eat properly!" He rolls his eyes.

Donghae whacks Hyukjae's back worriedly and handed him a glass of water. "That's what you get for being mean."

Hyukjae coughs and finally forces his food down. "Shut up."

 

Donghae laughs and hugs Hyukjae around the shoulders. "You're so adorable!"

"I'm trying to eat here," Shindong interrupts. 

 

Hyukjae leans over to kiss Donghae on the cheek, feeling too giddy to care about any boundaries. 

 

//

 

"Psst! Donghae!" Hyukjae harshly whispers above the snoring men. "Donghae!"

 

Donghae tosses in his sleep, unaware. 

"Donghae!" Hyukjae calls, a little louder this time. 

 

Donghae blinks his eyes open, and he props himself up with his elbow to see who's calling him, and he finds Hyukjae by the door. 

 

"Come on!" Hyukjae steps out and closes the door, certain that Donghae will follow him. 

 

Donghae swings his feet over his bed, and picks up his boots, then he tiptoes towards the door. He looks behind him to make sure that everyone is still sleeping, and then he slips out of the room, finding Hyukjae just outside the door. 

 

"What?" Donghae whispers, looking around, feeling paranoid. Their budding relationship isn't exactly a secret, but for some reason, there is still this feeling that he should be as discreet as possible. 

"Nothing, I just felt lonely," Hyukjae whispers as well. He tugs at Donghae's hand, and the elder just follows without a fight. He was too sleepy anyways. "I have a big bed, you know."

 

Donghae goes up to the third floor, and he finds himself inside Hyukjae's bedroom. 

 

"Um, haha, this is embarrassing," Hyukjae murmurs. 

Donghae sets his boots down, and he sits on the bed. He's not going to complain. He will be near Hyukjae. "Come on." He holds out an arm. 

 

Hyukjae comes to him without anymore reservations, and they both fall on the bed together. "I like being held, so hold me," Hyukjae demands. 

Donghae chuckles, almost half-asleep. Hyukjae's bed is very comfortable compared to the small bed he has downstairs. He is very happy to oblige Hyukjae on his demands. It is also what he desires. 

 

Donghae turns so that Hyukjae is beside him, and he scoops him into his arms. He lets a hand wander down to Hyukjae's leg, and hooks it around his waist. Hyukjae rests his head on his other arm, and he leans closer, until his head is nestled on Donghae's collarbone and neck. 

 

"You know, the more I get to know you, the more I see that you're really demanding," Donghae comments, and he yawns at the end of his sentence. "I thought that you were shy."

"Aren't you shy too?" Hyukjae asks. 

"Can you tell?" 

"Yeah. You don't talk to other people unless they approach you first. I notice that you keep to yourself a lot, and prefers working alone. However, you're also kind of childish when you get comfortable. Like, your thoughts are kind of...naive?"

"Are you sure about that?" Donghae murmurs raspily. His hand wanders to Hyukjae's upper thigh, which the latter slaps off.

"Not naive in an innocent way. More like, even though you try so hard to not get your hopes up, you somehow still do-like you can't help it. I can't imagine what you have been through outside of this land, and I can't relate. So for you to try and dampen that faith you have, it must be hard."

 

Donghae swallows. It seems that Hyukjae had paid more attention to him than what the eye can see. 

"Can't you stay longer?" Hyukjae finally addresses the elephant in the room. He says it in such a tiny voice that Donghae's heart prickles with sadness. 

"I'll be back next year," Donghae says to comfort him. 

"Yeah, but then..."

"But then?"

"...I'll miss you." Hyukjae pouts. "I already miss you now. How much more when I can't even see you. How can we make it work when we've barely started us?"

 

Donghae smiles and plays with the hair on top of Hyukjae's head. "I'll write to you. I'll send gifts."

"Okay."

"Don't think about these things yet. You have to keep your options open."

"Is that you seriously telling me to find someone else when you're not here?"

"Haha. No. I think I will go crazy from jealousy."

 

"Then, what Donghae?" 

"I like that you want things planned out, and that you want every detail to be revealed to you immediately. However, life is full of surprises. So try to live the moment first."

"I can tell you've thought about a lot of things."

"Yeah. I'm not actually an idiot."

Hyukjae giggles, feeling at ease. 

 

"Kiss me goodnight?" Donghae yawns. 

Hyukjae looks up, and inches closer to Donghae's face. "What do I get from it?" 

"It's a kiss, Hyuk. You also get a kiss." 

"I'm kinda sleepy..."

"Kiss me," Donghae almost whines. 

 

Hyukjae leans forward to capture Donghae's lips, enveloping them with his own. He leads the kiss slowly, and he lazily traces the roof of Donghae's mouth, and eventually sucking his tongue as well. Donghae grunts from reciprocating the kiss, and he opens his mouth to let Hyukjae in further. He feels Hyukjae push him to his back, and he supports his waist as he climbs on top of him. His hands go to Hyukjae's thighs, running up and down, gripping them hard. He can make out the silhouette of Hyukjae's smirk in the dark, indicating that he intends to take this farther. 

 

Donghae feels wary, but when Hyukjae leans forward again to kiss him, his rationale goes down the drain. 

 

Hyukjae grinds down on Donghae's crotch, and the older sucks in a breath. 

 

"Hyukjae," Donghae whispers. 

The younger repeats his action, going harder to feel Donghae better. He lets out a strangled moan, when Donghae bucks his waist up towards him. 

 

"Fuck, fuck, what-" Donghae gasps as he couldn't do anything else but let Hyukjae pleasure himself over him. His breathing quickens, as Hyukjae's body moves over him, and he grows frustrated as he feels himself harden. He wants to sleep, but he would be damned if he refuses Hyukjae. 

Hyukjae breathes out, shuddering a little, and then he sneaks his hands under Donghae's shirt, feeling up the toned body under there. Donghae's grip on his thighs encourages him to be braver, and he connects his lips with Donghae. He cuts it short to move down to his neck, lightly trailing down until he finds Donghae's collarbone and bites it. 

 

Donghae elicits a moan, feeling tortured because of his restraint towards himself and Hyukjae deliciously putting his hands and mouth over the right places. 

 

"Should I stop?" Hyukjae rasps coyly. 

"Damn you," Donghae growls softly. "You tricked me..."

"You should have known better," Hyukjae replies. 

"Noted."

 

Donghae props himself up to sit up, and Hyukjae slides down to his lap. He sighs as he holds Hyukjae's beguiling hips. He's afraid of going too far, yet he also wants to show how much he likes Hyukjae. "What am I going to do with you?" He leans over and whispers over Hyukjae's lips. He closes his eyes, as if that will calm the raging attraction he has for him. 

Hyukjae gives Donghae a quick, innocent kiss on his chin, and leans his forehead on it. "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah?"

"You liked me first because you thought I was a girl."

"Hyuk..." Donghae softly protests. 

"I just want to know how you came to like me. Sometimes, I really can't believe if we're real. You must crave for other things in life..."

 

Donghae mules this thought over. It didn't even occur to him that Hyukjae might have doubts about their relationship, but maybe it's inevitable because yes, it all started because he really liked him as a girl. 

"I hope you don't like me just because you think I can be pleasing to your eyes..."

 

Donghae takes his hand and places it on Hyukjae's cheek. His thumb grazes over his cheekbone, and in the dark, he can make out the outline of Hyukjae's cute nose; the sharp bridge and the way it rounds at the tip. "I admit, I did like you because of your appearance, but I didn't even know your name then. Now, I just like you. Is that enough? I like you as you."

"I'm a man," Hyukjae murmurs. 

"So what? Leeteuk and Heechul are men, but it doesn't mean they can't love each other. You understand me, you pay close attention to me and take care of me. You're the companion anyone could ever need."

"Ohh, so it's because I'm necessary to you, okay."

Donghae sighs. "No, Hyukjae. Not because you're necessary to me, but because you fit me in more ways than I can fit my hands into gloves. When I wake up, you're the first face I look forward to in the morning, and the last face I want to see before I sleep. I want to take up all of your precious time, even though I'm continiously losing mine. I want to be near you, even if I don't get to hold your hand." Donghae blinks, feeling his throat get tight. 

 

Hyukjae frames Donghae's face with his palms, and squeezes his cheeks. "I knew I wasn't wrong about you."

Donghae can see Hyukjae's smile in the dark. 

"I can see at times that you think you're so hardcore, but I like this side of you. This sensitive, thoughtful you."

"See? You bring out the best in me."

"I'd like to think so." 

 

Donghae slowly lies back down, and Hyukjae slides beside him. 

 

"Are we going to take care of your problem?" Hyukjae drawls, suddenly pressing a hand against Donghae's half-hard cock. He rubs it through the cloth, a devilish smile coming over his features.

 

Donghae moans, as he feels Hyukjae's deft fingers go under his trousers, ghosting over the sensitive skin. "Just leave it."

"Oh no, no, no. It will be painful for you." Hyukjae chuckles. "I can't allow that. I'm caring for you."

"Hyukjae."

"Come now, old man. Do you go through your life keeping in your pent-up frustrations?"

"Of course not-" Donghae hisses, as Hyukjae starts to palm him. 

 

"Oh? Were there nights when you thought of me, and you had to resort to your own hand? Must I use something else then?"

Donghae groans, and he slaps his mouth shut with his hand as Hyukjae increases his speed. He fights to keep still, but he finds himself thrusting into Hyukjae's hand eagerly, his heels planting on the mattress. He lets out a muffled moan, his eyes squeezing shut in pleasure. He's done this many times to himself, but there's just something enticing about Hyukjae controlling his release. He is losing his mind, his breath comes out in short rasps, and he only thinks of Hyukjae's hand bringing him to the edge. 

 

He comes, his fists tightening on the sheets beneath him. He feels lightheaded and not quite there, until he feels Hyukjae's reassuring weight beside him, and he thinks about what more can happen to him if they decide to do more of this. 

 

//

 

Donghae wakes up before Hyukjae does, feeling unexpectedly rejuvenated. He looks beside him, and sees Hyukjae curled up to fit the space between Donghae's arm and his body. The rooster outside announces the arrival of dawn, and Donghae sits up. He covers Hyukjae up to his shoulders, plants a kiss on his ear, and then carefully rolled out of the bed. He takes one more look at the sleeping figure on the very large bed, and he silently sneaks out of the bedroom.

 

He treads quietly down the stairs, but they creak every time Donghae steps on a board. He curses mentally, but to his relief, he was able to make it to the very bottom. Except for some noise in the kitchen, the dining area is empty. 

 

He sees the slightly opened windows and observes the way light is slowly making its way up from the horizon, breaking up the sky to bring the sun into the view. Dark hues of the night still cover his line of sight, but it gives off a pristine, melancholy air, as if he's the only person to exist in the world. 

 

"Morning," Heechul's voice come up from behind him. 

Donghae jumps a little, startled. "Good morning."

"Why are you up so early?" Heechul queries, a seemingly knowing eyebrow up. 

"I woke up early?"

Heechul pats him on the shoulder, and steers him towards the kitchen. "How's Hyukjae? Is my nephew giving you a hard time?"

 

Donghae chuckles inwardly. Hyukjae does give him all kinds of hard times, all right. 

 

"I'm guessing that you two get along well then."

"Yes."

"Good. I'm glad. Can we skip all this talk of me threatening you to treat him right? Hyukjae often sees the good in people and if he trusts you, I trust you."

Donghae slowly smiles. "He's very attentive."

Heechul peers at him. "Of course he is. Me and Teuk basically raised him, he better be."

 

Donghae nods at this. "What are his favorite things to do?"

Heechul chuckles at this. "He likes horse riding, planting, harvesting strawberries...arm wrestling, running, actual wrestling..."

Donghae laughs. 

"You laugh, but he's pretty strong."

"I know. He almost dislocated my arm too many times."

"Yep. Sounds just like him."

"Are there any places that he frequents?"

"Not that I know of." Heechul turns to him, and places a hand on his hip. He gives Donghae a once over, and he smirks when he saw his trousers. "Before anything else, you might want to clean yourself first."

 

Donghae narrows his eyes at Heechul, but then he glances down at the part where Heechul is smirking at. He flushes, and he quickly covers the front of his pants. 

 

Heechul cackles, probably waking up the occupants of the house. "My baby nephew is growing up!" He exclaims. "I didn't know you two moved up from kissing!" 

 

Donghae shuffles away, too embarrassed to respond that he got caught like this. He curses at himself for being careless as he rushes to his room, hoping that the remaining darkness can cover up his cum on his trousers as he grabs for a new pair-his only other pair, which reminded him that he needs to get another. 

 

He takes his soiled clothing and he walks to the laundry room, his heart thundering like crazy.


	8. Chapter 8

The sun is high on the sky, beating down the working men as they go through their jobs. Most of the crops that had been planted during the spring are growing, and they will be ready for harvest before autumn starts. Donghae goes to repair some equipment again, and even made some renovation to the white house on the hill with other men. He doesn't seem much of Hyukjae at all since he has been busy catching up with Saeun and taking care of the house, but when he accidentally came upon the Hyukjae's window, he sees the younger staring at him mischievously-as if he knows that Donghae will be on the right place, at the right time. Donghae ends up staring back, unsure whether he should wave hi or just saunter back to what he is suppose to be doing, but it was too late to contemplate any action when Hyukjae suddenly pinches his nipple and throws his head back, his mouth opening lewdly and exposing his white neck. 

 

Donghae feels sweaty all over, and it is not from the hot temperature. "Hyukjae," he breathes out, trying to calm himself. He looks around to check if there's anyone around him.

 

Donghae can only gape as Hyukjae's fingers travel down his torso, and under his pants. 

 

"Hey!" Someone calls. 

Donghae jerks, his mind going haywire from seeing Hyukjae touch himself. 

 

Donghae looks around, but no one is addressing him. He takes a deep breath to calm himself, and throws a glare towards the window, where Hyukjae is full on laughing. 

 

Stop that, he mouths. 

Hyukjae blows a kiss towards him, and then walks away from the window.

 

//

 

"That's him?" Saeun asks, passing back the binoculars that Hyukjae handed her. "He's hot."

"Noona!" Hyukjae giggles. 

"What? He is!"

 

Saeun laughs with Hyukjae, and then smiles at him with pride shining all over her features. "You know, when I first met you a few years back, you seem so sad most of the time. But I do know that when you smile, oh my gods, I felt like I wanted to give the world to you. Seeing you now, I'm so happy that you met him and that you're smiling most of the time now." 

Hyukjae glances towards the direction where Donghae is. "I don't want to attribute my happiness to him, but my days are definitely better when I'm with him. I always look forward to the next moment I would see him."

Saeun puts an arm around Hyukjae's shoulders. "Awww, my little brother is in love!"

 

"I'm not a baby anymore!" Hyukjae protests, pretending to take Saeun's arm off his shoulders. 

However, Saeun is also strong, and she tightens her grip around him. "I'm not easy!" She uses her other hand to tickle Hyukjae. 

 

Hyukjae screeches, trying to break away. "Noona!"

 

"All right, all right, I'll stop!" Saeun exclaims. "Only if you tell me what you two have been up to!"

Hyukjae gasps. "What?" 

 

Saeun proceeds to tickle Hyukjae, purposely attacking his most sensitive areas. 

 

"Okay, okay!" Hyukjae cries, tears falling out of his eyes from laughing too much. 

 

//

 

Donghae was tending to the pens inside the barn that separates the animals, when Hyukjae came swaggering in, a weave basket resting on the crook of his elbow. Hyukjae watches Donghae work in concentration-ever the loner, the man who prefers his own ways instead of following everyone else to do the same thing. Hyukjae observes the line between his forehead as he nails a piece of wood together, and the way he bites his lip or place his tongue on the side of his mouth. 

 

Hyukjae waits patiently, content to watch Donghae like this. Also because he wanted him to finish his task. He knew too well that with him around, Donghae will never get anything done. 

 

Donghae finished, and he lays his hammer down on the ground. Light filtered through the windows of the barn and through the cracks of the wall. Dust float in the air, and somewhere outside, he could hear a goat bloating. 

 

"Want some lemonade?" Hyukjae asks quietly. 

 

Donghae startles and he turns to his left, where Hyukjae is standing. His legs are bared, and Donghae turns away, feeling a blush creep up his neck. 

"Shouldn't you be used to this now?" Hyukjae chuckles, taking off the white blanket on top of his basket and producing a glass container filled with the said lemonade. 

"Could I ever get used to how beautiful you are?" Donghae counters, his voice deep and silent. 

Hyukjae laughs and he walks over. "Yeah, nice save. Here. I made this especially for you, don't tell the others."

 

Hyukjae hands him the glass container, and also takes out a sandwich from the basket. 

 

Donghae takes them gratefully, and stands up. He tucks the container under his armpit and started uncovering the sandwich to take a bite. "What are you up to?" 

"Saeun noona wanted to spend some more time with Sungmin hyung, so they went to town. I did some chores in the house, talked to Leeteuk and then I came here."

 

Donghae munches on his sandwich, his eyes going over Hyukjae's face fondly. "Thank you for this."

Hyukjae shrugs, but a blush paints over his cheeks. "It's nothing."

"It's not nothing," Donghae laughs. "Just accept it."

 

Donghae finishes the rest of the sandwich and drinks all of the lemonade, then he puts the glass container back inside the basket. His face comes up closer to Hyukjae, and the younger leans away. 

 

"Why so shy today?" Donghae confidently smirks. 

Hyukjae does not take a step back, even though they are breathing in the same air. Hyukjae couldn't help his eyes wander to Donghae's moist lips, and then back to his warm, brown eyes that is glinting with another motive. "No reason," Hyukjae's voice gradually gets quieter. 

 

He wasn't nervous, no, far from it. Seeing Donghae work like that just made his mind think of the many ways they can use this hidden moment to their advantage. He anticipates Donghae's next move, feeling his strong fingers on his waist and then holding on to it. He couldn't help feel flustered as Donghae leans his forehead against his, and then gives him a small peck on his lips. 

 

Donghae slowly backs him up, and Hyukjae submits to his movements, even dropping the basket on the ground. He rests his hands on Donghae's arms, suddenly becoming clueless where he should place them. 

 

Hyukjae's back meets the wall, his eyes never leaving Donghae's fiery gaze, then Donghae pins him there with his own body. He couldn't help but squirm when Donghae suddenly latches his hot mouth against his neck, his tongue running over the skin and sucking on it. His blood rushes south, and he feels his body heat with desire, but he remembers to let Donghae have his way first. He whimpers through his pressed lips as Donghae keeps on attacking that patch of skin, unwilling to make a sound. The prospect of someone walking in on them at any time adds to the jittery feelings that is making him feel light-headed.

 

"H-hae-" Hyukjae gasps, as Donghae moves up just under the space between his jaw and ear. Repeating the same action, but then blowing on the spots that he had licked. 

 

Finally, he elicits a moan, and he hears Donghae chuckle. 

 

"I thought you'd fight it some more," he rasps. 

"Shut the hell up, and kiss me properly," Hyukjae demanded, and he takes Donghae's chin with his fingers. 

"As you wish, Your Majesty," Donghae jokes. 

 

Donghae leans forward and connects their lips together, while a hand moves down to his hip, to his butt and then to his thigh. He lifts up Hyukjae's leg to his waist, and presses himself closer to Hyukjae's space. 

"Someone could hear us," Hyukjae hisses, biting his lip as he feels Donghae rub his crotch against his. "Or see us."

 

Hyukjae's face is heating up to the point that he feels like his brain is being cooked slowly. 

 

"Donghae," Hyukjae protests lamely. 

"I don't think you care," Donghae chuckles, licking the dip between Hyukjae's neck and collarbone. 

 

Hyukjae throws his head back, but it hits the wall behind him. Donghae immediately puts a hand on the back of his head and smiles at him gently. 

 

"What's gotten into you?" Hyukjae asks, his eyes darting away.

Donghae laughs and pecks Hyukjae's lips again. "Can I show you something?" 

"What is it?" 

"Just...endure it," Donghae says cheekily. 

 

Donghae presses his hot mouth against Hyukjae's chest, and he tugs down on the dress to suck on one of Hyukjae's chocolate nipples. He flicks his tongue against it, eliciting a soft moan from Hyukjae. He bites it on, tugging, and then sucking on the skin around it, determined to mark him there. One of Hyukjae's hands made it to the back of Donghae's head, and he pulls his hair hard. Donghae is urged to suck on the skin harshly, and Hyukjae lets out a breathy exhale. 

 

"Ah-" Hyukjae gasps as Donghae intentionally grinds his knee against his crotch. 

 

Hyukjae can only watch as Donghae makes eye contact with him, and as he slowly lowers himself to his knees. Donghae grips the cheeks of Hyukjae's ass, and then hikes his dress higher up his thighs.

 

"Donghae-" Hyukjae protests, his hands going down to stop him. 

"Put your leg on my shoulder," Donghae commands. 

"What? No-"

 

Donghae grabs Hyukjae's leg, almost making the younger stumble, and puts it on his shoulder. "What did I tell you? Just endure it."

Hyukjae whimpers as Donghae begins to ravish the inner thigh of his leg that was on Donghae's shoulder. Hyukjae pulls on Donghae's hair again, which spurs Donghae to bite the skin, and he moves up, closer and closer to the skin that borders Hyukjae's crotch. 

 

Hyukjae blushes, and he wants to run away from this scene, but it's making his head light and his stomach twist in an enjoyable feeling that he just winds up wanting more. It may be dirty, it may be all kinds of wrong, but Hyukjae never really cared for boundaries if one is set on him.

 

So when Donghae just takes him into his mouth, Hyukjae couldn't control the continuous lewd moans coming out of his mouth. He gives in to the weakness of his knees, and ends up relying on Donghae to keep him upright, and he loses himself as Donghae coaxes him into release with his burning tongue and slick cavern. 

 

"Holy shit," a wicked voice comments. "Wait 'till Leeteuk hears about this."

 

Hyukjae regains a little bit of his self, and he spots Kyuhyun standing by the barn's entrance, his mouth open wide, but his eyes glittered in dark excitement. 

 

Hyukjae stares at Kyuhyun in shock, and Donghae feels himself dying inside-and no, it wasn't the cum that he just swallowed. 

 

"Kyuhyun, I'm gonna kill you!" Hyukjae bellowed. He pushes Donghae aside to run after his so-called family. 

 

He chases him out of the barn, and since he was fast enough, he jumps on Kyuhyun's back and tackles him to the ground. Kyuhyun had the nerve to cackle, which earns him a slap on the head. 

 

"Hey!" Kyuhyun protests, clearly enjoying Hyukjae's flustered reaction. 

 

Hyukjae immediately surrounds his fingers against Kyuhyun's neck, and the latter's eyes widened in shock. 

 

"Hyukjae!" Donghae calls, bewildered at the scene before him. 

 

Kyuhyun slaps Hyukjae's arms, and puts all his strength into throwing Hyukjae off of him. However, Hyukjae was not one to give up, so without hesitation, he grabs hold of Kyuhyun's arm and bites it. 

 

"Ow!" Kyuhyun shouts, trying to wrestle himself away from Hyukjae's evil teeth. 

Donghae decides to stay by the sidelines, and he notices some men glancing their way. 

 

Kyuhyun takes his knee and brings it up between Hyukjae's legs. 

 

Hyukjae screams and lets go of Kyuhyun, tears immediately flowing out of his eyes. "What the fuck?!" He shouts. "I will fucking get you, you fucking-" Hyukjae groans and he squints his eyes from the pain. "Shit!" 

 

Donghae glances at Kyuhyun who is running towards the hill, and then he goes to Hyukjae, who is curled up on the ground. 

 

"Babe," Donghae treads carefully, but he stops when Hyukjae throws him a glare. 

"Don't 'babe' me, go after that dipshit!" 

 

//

 

Hyukjae retires for the rest of the night, and when everyone else has turned in to sleep, Donghae sneaks out to go to Hyukjae's room. He comes in silently, knowing that the younger had began leaving his door unlocked just for him. He spots Hyukjae's figure under all the blankets and pillows, and he moves them out of the way so he can wrap his sweetheart into his arms. Hyukjae immediately snuggles into him, turning around to rest his face between the space of Donghae's neck and collarbone. 

 

"You left marks on my neck, chest and inner thigh," Hyukjae murmurs. "I had to explain them to Leeteuk."

"But the one on your chest isn't visible," Donghae muses. "And your thigh."

"Oh yes, but apparently, that dipshit tattletaled, and-"

 

Donghae chuckles, his chest vibrating with the sound. It stops Hyukjae's rant, and the younger pouts. 

 

"What did you tell Leeteuk?"

"Well," Hyukjae starts, and Donghae chuckles again. "Stop that."

Donghae squeezes Hyukjae. "Was he mad?"

 

Hyukjae thinks for a moment. Leeteuk did not seem surprised nor mad. "I don't think so...maybe a bit disappointed, but he just did this lip pressing thing he does that makes you feel bad, then told me to be more discreet."

Donghae kisses the top of Hyukjae's head. "Heechul must have told him already."

"That you and I are doing stuff like this?"

"Yeah."

"That's embarrassing!"

 

Donghae chuckles. "I mean, at least they approve."

"Yeah."

 

Donghae feels Hyukjae tighten his arm against his waist, and he smiles. These moments are so precious to him, because it reminds him that Hyukjae really does care about him and that he feels this peace that just calms his heart no matter what kind of adversity faces him. He wasn't afraid of Heechul or Leeteuk's disapproval, or the looming distance between him and Hyukjae that will soon make itself apparent once he departs. He really feels as if he can come back to Hyukjae anytime, and they would be frozen in a bubble far from the turning of the world.

 

Why search for another temporary place to stay and adapt to, when he's found a home in Hyukjae?

 

The realization strikes him breathless, and even before he can form the proper words, they die out when he hears Hyukjae snore against him. 

 

"Goodnight," Donghae whispers. 


	9. Chapter 9

Heechul stares at the notice in his hands. He didn't need to read it to know what it says. The young boy in front of him in a fancy jacket that shows he was from a railroad company bites his lip nervously. Heechul continues to stare at the notice, not really reading the words, but just staring enough to let the boy know that he's doing something. 

Finally, he lowers the paper. 

 

Past the boy, Heechul finds his large land that he inherited from his late father. He had promised to take care of it and to nurture it so that it will continue to live on to the next generation. His eyes find the strawberry fields, the citrus groves, the rice and corn fields, and the wide open space for all the animals to roam. 

 

"No," Heechul finally says, surprised that he is calm. Usually, he would blow up and yell so that they young boy in front of him would scurry away. "Tell them, that I will not give up my land no matter what price they name."

The young boy catches the notice paper before it touches the ground. "But sir-"

"I said no. I am a citizen of this country, and I have a right to my property."

"Sir, if you-"

"Get out of my sight."

 

"The government will take your land if it's necessary," the boy reasons. 

"Over my dead body," Heechul counters icily. 

 

Heechul refuses to address the boy further, and finally, he puts on his hat and leaves. Heechul sighs wearily, and he massages the bridge of his nose. Then he looks up, and finds Hyukjae standing there, a solemn line drawn over his lips. Heechul's heart breaks, because he intended to keep this a secret from Hyukjae, who grew up in this land, whose childhood had witnessed endless summers with horse rides and strawberries, who knows this land like the back of his hand. 

 

"I'm sorry," Heechul says, and Hyukjae strides over to crash into his arms. 

 

Leeteuk walks in, and he sees the two embracing, and he smiles grimly when Heechul meets his eyes. Then, he joins them and the three of them hugged each other. 

 

"We won't lose our home," Heechul asserts.

Leeteuk rubs circular motions on Hyukjae's back, and he kisses his forehead. "Yeah. Don't cry. We will fight for it."

Hyukjae buries himself in Leeteuk and Heechul's embrace, basking in their comfort, their familial presence. 

 

//

 

Donghae gets pushed against the trunk of the citrus tree, and he smirks excitedly as Hyukjae's hand presses against his abdomen hard. Donghae's hands go up to take off the floppy hat on Hyukjae's head and drops it to the ground, then tugs off his wig, undressing him to get to his true self, so he can see him better. Hyukjae didn't seem to mind, since he presses his weight against Donghae, and their lips connect in the sweetest way, like a surrender to a feather bed after a long day of hard work. 

Donghae runs his hands through Hyukjae's soft, short hair, and then he caresses his neck, and down to his arms, and then his small waist. He smiles against their open-mouthed kisses, as Hyukjae desperately pours everything he has, painting Donghae's senses with the thick smells of the citrus, of strawberries; the tingly sensations he feels on his hot, sweaty skin; the sight of wide, open green grass and the sun piercing through his eyelashes-all of it coming from Hyukjae's plump mouth against his.

 

Hyukjae sneaks his hands under Donghae's shirt, feeling the toned torso under it, pale hands against a tanned chest and abdomen. Hyukjae giggles, enjoying how it sturdy it feels under his palm, how beautiful and tangible Donghae is. He feels Donghae's hand going down to his lower back, until it was resting on his ass. Donghae cups it to pull Hyukjae closer, and Hyukjae automatically seals any space between them. 

 

"They might be looking for you," Donghae murmurs in between kisses.

"Five more minutes," Hyukjae whispers, and he shoves his tongue back into Donghae's mouth, tracing the older's tongue, flicking it against his and against the roof of his mouth. 

 

Donghae chuckles, letting Hyukjae take control of the kiss. He lazily follows Hyukjae, complimenting the dance that he's initiating, sucking on his delicious lips and taking little gasps to get air. He tightens his hold on Hyukjae, even though it was impossible for them to get any closer. They were practically breathing each other in and out. 

 

Hyukjae starts to grin against Donghae's lips, and they naturally come to a halt. Now, they admire each other with hearts in their eyes, the corners soft and wide. 

"Five minutes are up," Donghae mutters. He leans forward to kiss the tip of Hyukjae's nose.

"Not really, but since you're so eager to let me go," Hyukjae teases. 

 

Donghae grips his arm, and kisses Hyukjae's chin. "You go," Donghae tells him. There was something he should say, something better that will befit their temporary parting, but he could not, for the life of him say it. 

"See you at dinner."

"See you."

 

Donghae helps Hyukjae don his wig and then his hat, and he sends him off, watching his wide shoulders that adds to his enticing figure retreat. These days, Hyukjae is kissing him with more fervor, as if he's trying to draw something out of Donghae. He didn't want to think of it further, did not want his mind to overanalyze things, but sometimes, when he and Hyukjae are in the middle of their kissing, there is always this voice that urges them to take it to the next level. It whispers and crawls over their skin with every touch and lustful gazes, and Donghae, for the life of him, has a tendency to let Hyukjae have his way and succumb to his direction.

 

Donghae sighs and runs his fingers through his hair. There's a lot they need to talk about. 

 

//

 

"No, a little to the left," Hyukjae suggests. He taps his chin thoughtfully, as Kyuhyun and Sungmin tries to properly set the arch over the front steps of the porch. 

 

"Okay, stop!" Hyukjae says. He clasps his hands together, pleased at the unadorned arch where Sungmin and Saeun are going to get married under. He grins excitedly, and he assigns Kyuhyun to cut up the ribbons, while he and Sungmin braided the wires where the flowers will be later twined on together. 

 

In the distance, men are finishing up some of the harvests and cutting up wood, cleaning up the farm and equipment, and helping set up the long tables for the wedding's banquet. He spots Saeun with Heechul organizing fruit baskets and gossiping, and Leeteuk and Donghae talking wtih each other while they hauled some chairs around. 

The days are longer in this time of the year, and it has its own way of making time pass by slowly. The workload is slowing down, and it's almost time for them to package their products and bring them to businesses in several places. One of Heechul's cousins, Kibum, who will come down from the north, will oversee the rest of the process, while the farm prepares for winter.

 

"And I'm done!" Sungmin exclaims. 

Hyukjae stares at his fingers, which had paused over its work. "How'd you know you want to get married?"

 

At this point, Kyuhyun also finishes his work and joins them. 

 

Sungmin smiles softly. "I love her. I would move mountains and heavens just to be by her side. I look at her, and I can imagine spending my whole life with her."

 

Hyukjae stares at Sungmin. The hyung that he grew up with and had so many childish moments with, had matured now. Sungmin has always been brave and kind, and he would always put his family first.

 

"You love her," Hyukjae mumbles. 

Kyuhyun chuckles at Hyukjae's expression. "What's got you thinking so hard, hm?"

Hyukjae sends an annoyed look towards Kyuhyun. 

 

Kyuhyun chuckes again, his shoulders shaking. "If you love him, just say it."

"But what if I do, and I end up embarrassing myself? Come on, be realistic, Kyu. We're a summer fling. He probably thinks we are."

 

Kyuhyun frowns, and he smacks Hyukjae on the back. "You're so fucking stupid. I can't believe we're related."

"We're not that related."

Kyuhyun groans, and Sungmin laughs. 

 

"Just go talk to him," Kyuhyun tells him, exasperated. "You two spend a lot of time shacking up in the barn, you don't even use your mouths properly."

Hyukjae flushes red, while Sungmin stares at him with amusement. 

 

"Can you not?" Hyukjae says through gritted teeth.

Sungmin and Kyuhyun bursts out laughing.

 

//

 

The sky turns into a deep purple shade, with hints of pink where the setting sun still has claims over. The young night eases over the land, covering it with a light darkness, a last signal to make the creatures of the day retire until dawn. Under this ever-changing night sky, rowdy music plays, celebrating the union of Sungmin and Saeun. The last light of the sun is swallowed by the rising moon, and the men drinks to a long night of joyous songs for the wedded. 

 

In the midst of reddening faces and spilled drinks of overbrimming mugs, Donghae meets Hyukjae's eyes from across the room, past the happy couple dancing. They distinguish each other from the background noise, drowning into their own reverie. Suddenly, Hyukjae smiles and Donghae tries not to barrel through the long tables to make his way towards Hyukjae. 

A fiddle starts up, the player's arm swinging a colorful rhythm, and the men flock to the floor, chanting their travel and drunken songs. 

 

Hyukjae watches as Sungmin kisses Saeun, and he immediately thinks of Donghae, and finds him pushing his chair back to escape. Hyukjae bites his lower lip, anticipating for the right time to time his disappearance too. He has been waiting all day to have some alone time with Donghae, but it never comes since he needed to attend to his family for this wedding. 

Hyukjae sees Donghae disappear around the dark surroundings of the barn, and he fidgets in his seat. 

 

The night wears on, and Hyukjae becomes restless, frustrated at the prospect that he is making Donghae wait. 

 

He watches Heechul and Leeteuk converse with each other, their understanding gazes still trying to find the right level, after all these years. They were good at their jobs, but private matters required them a lot of talking and silence-but there was no better companion to share their sorrows other than each other. 

Maybe love is uncanny that way. Easy to start, but harder to make it work and last. Maybe it brings people together, not only because of romance, but because it narrows down a person's heart, breaks it wide open for the right one who will mold it with his own broken pieces so that they will always be together. 

Hyukjae stands from his seat abruptly. Kyuhyun, who is oceans deep inebriated, grins at Hyukjae and chugs another filled mug. 

 

Hyukjae shakes his head, and he runs into the darkness, towards the barn and he barrels into Donghae, who receives him sweetly. 

 

"Took you long enough," Donghae murmurs against his ear. "Of all places, why'd you want to meet here?"

Hyukjae feels his heart thrum against his throat and his trembling fingers. 

 

"I sense that you're scheming something again," Donghae chirps with humor. 

Hyukjae inhales, and he hides his face into Donghae's neck. "Take me," he mumbles. 

 

Donghae's strong arms tighten around him. "I'm sorry, what?" 

"Take me," Hyukjae says, a little louder. He feels himself blush. 

"Hyukjae...you are underage," Donghae nervously said. 

 

"Bullshit," Hyukjae counters, growing confused. "We're only a few years apart."

 

"I'm twenty-six," Donghae states, and Hyukjae falls slack in his hold. "Next year, you become an adult. We can do whatever you want then." Donghae feels a little embarrassed. 

Hyukjae regains his composure. Age-gap be damned. "What if there's no next year?"

 

Donghae places his hands on Hyukjae's shoulder. "There will be a next year, because when I get back, I won't be taking any more jobs."

 

Donghae's hands move up to Hyukjae's neck. "I want to build a life with you, Hyukjae. I hope that we can do it together. I know that you're young, and God, this country is deprived, but there is still so much life for you out there to experience, but I hope that when you take a step backward, you will let me take your hand and let yourself lean on me."

 

Hyukjae's mouth parts slightly in amazement. Donghae always had a wonderful array of words enclosed in his mind. He is careful like that, but that's because he means every action he will take. He only ever speaks the truth. 

 

"I love you," Hyukjae breathes out. He has been holding it for so, so long. He just wants to finally say something meaningful, instead of prancing around in pretend. He hopes Donghae knows that he means it, with every beat of his childish, naive heart. 

 

Donghae smiles in the dark, pleased. "I know." He leans forward and touches his forehead against Hyukjae's. "But I need you to say it next year, when you're of age."

Hyukjae grumbles under his breath, throwing a mini-tantrum. "Are you fucking kidding me?" 

 

Donghae giggles and he pulls Hyukjae closer. "You're so adorable, my beautiful baby. The most adorable."

Hyukjae feels himself blush hard. "Stop that," he hisses in warning.

 

"Stop what?" Donghae cooes. "Aww, I can tell you're pouting right now. Aww, my beautiful, baby Hyukjae-OW!"

 

Donghae snaps away from Hyukjae, feeling like he needs to curl up in a fetal position. He hugs his arms to himself, but it doesn't stop the pain in his underarms, where Hyukjae decked him without warning. 

Hyukjae starts to laugh in a low tone, but it grows into a full one that shakes his body to the core. 

 

"I didn't deserve that!" Donghae whines childishly. 

 

// 

 

Hyukjae couldn't sleep at all. He tried his best not to toss and turn because Donghae is sleeping fitfully beside him. Anxiety gnaws at him, and while Donghae had neutralized the feeling earlier, he feel it creeping back in like ice, now that he's alone with his thoughts. 

He hears dawn come as the rooster calls, and he feels Donghae stir. He feels the bed dipping with Donghae's weight as the latter wakes up, and he pretends to sleep when Donghae gives him a light kiss on the forehead. 

 

When he hears the door shut close, he jumps out of bed like it's lava, and he forgets that he's very particular about the way his things are organized. He pulls all of his drawers open, ransacking each one to find anything that can remind Donghae of him when he goes. 

He was close to tearing up when he couldn't find anything of value and meaning, when his eyes catch the picture of him, Heechul and Leeteuk. He makes a grab for it as if it will be snatched away in any second, and manhandles the frame until he can take out the picture with trembling fingers. 

 

His hand blindly searches for something to write with, and it comes in contact with his eyeliner pencil. Frowning, he tosses it aside and rummages for a proper pen, and he begins to write behind the picture. 

When he finished, he took one of his lipsticks and painted his lips with it, then puckered his mouth to plant a kiss beside his name. 

Daylight starts to shine, and Hyukjae watches his reflection in front of his vanity as the shadows shift according to the clock. 

 

He remembers to look pretty enough to send off the men, but he promises himself that this will be the last time Eunja will work to appease them. 

 

//

 

Hyukjae sat alone for breakfast, away from all the men in the dining area. He couldn't find Donghae anywhere, and he wasn't used to sitting without him anymore when eating their meals. He plays with his oatmeal, keeping a vigilant eye out one of the salon's huge windows, an unconscious pout on his lips. 

Unbeknownst to him, Donghae is smiling behind him, a bouquet of handpicked flowers hiding behind his back. 

 

He watches this candid view of Hyukjae, etching every detail into his mind. He's aware that things will change and he can never have control over that, so he tries to feel everything with an open heart-diving right in and never once wondering, why. 

 

"How could you just leave me like that?" Hyukjae mumbles to himself, still unaware of Donghae's presence. His frown deepens. 

Donghae couldn't keep it in anymore-he lets out a small laugh. 

 

Hyukjae's head snaps to his direction, an angry line on his pink, pretty mouth. He opens it to say something, but was interrupted when Donghae suddenly whips out the flowers from behind him, sheepishly holding it out towards his direction. 

 

"Oh," Hyukjae says, his frown easening. "I don't do flowers."

Donghae gapes at him, dumbfounded. "I woke up early for this, I don't know these flowers- I just took what looked pretty!"

 

Hyukjae chuckles, a little happy that he can control Donghae's mood so easily-though he knows that Donghae can also do the same to him. He's the only man Hyukjae will ever give in to.

"But I will take them because it's for me from you," he follows up. 

 

Donghae approaches shyly, like a bashful girl to the most popular guy in school. 

 

"And these are tulips, by the way," Hyukjae elaborates, pointing at the red buds. "It means...everlasting love."

 

Donghae blushes. He just picked whatever flower looked the best and went with it. 

 

"Thank you," Hyukjae said, accepting the bouquet with a glint of wonder in his eyes. "I have something for you too."

 

Donghae perks up, his straight eyebrows going up in excitement, his eyes wide and shiny like a child. 

Really, Donghae has changed. He stopped holding back his heart, and it was easier to breathe. 

 

"Close your eyes, or I won't give it," Hyukjae instructs. 

 

Trusting without reserve, Donghae closes his eyes, really squinting them shut-because see, he's closing his eyes and he wants Hyukjae's gift. 

Donghae almost doesn't feel it, but it is a lightweight feeling with edges. He opens his eyes slowly, and he finds a picture of a younger Hyukjae, eyes bright and sad at the same time, sandwiched between his father figures. 

 

"It's not the best," Hyukjae suddenly says, making Donghae look up. "My parents died around that time, so I know I look dreadful."

"You look beautiful," Donghae immediately says. 

 

Hyukjae scoffs. "You say that all the time."

"When have I ever lied to you?"

"Your truth is very subjective, Donghae."

"Must we argue about this now?"

 

Hyukjae purses his lips. Conversations with Donghae are either banter and arguments, or deep feelings and inside jokes, and flirting. 

 

"I'm sorry," Hyukjae finally says. "I'm bad at goodbyes. As you can see."

"It's not a goodbye, it's more like, 'see you'." Donghae takes one of Hyukjae's hand, and brings it up to his lips to place a chaste kiss. "Won't you trust me?"

 

Hyukjae feels like breaking down, but he reels it in by taking a deep breath. "Of course, I trust you."

Donghae smiles. "Then, we have nothing to worry about."

 

//

 

The men trickles slowly out of the white house and down the hill, some breaking off into endless chatter or song, and some choosing to be alone to bask under the hazy afternoon, drinking in the coming sunset of early autumn. 

Hyukjae nods at the men amicably, eyelashes down and face demure. Donghae pauses by and ruffles his head, and meets his gaze. 

 

"See you," Donghae emphasizes. He was tempted to kiss Hyukjae, to chase away the air he breathes and make it his own, but he settles for more hair ruffling.

 

Hyukjae loses his smile, and his words are stuck in his throat. He doesn't get to call out. He lets Donghae slip away, with the last of the working men. He feels Leeteuk's worried gaze on him, and Hyukjae thinks, this can't be it.

 

It doesn't feel right.

 

Hyukjae watches his retreating form until he becomes a tiny shape in the distance. He glances behind him with teary eyes, where Heechul came to stand with Leeteuk on the front porch, then he runs towards the stables with all that he's got. He forgoes the saddles and the reins, and boards Sandy without hesitation. 

 

"Let's go girl, let's go!" Hyukjae urges. 

 

He leads Sandy towards the citrus groves, holding on to her neck for support. Sandy jumps over the fences and small brook, then cuts through the forests until they arrive at the clearing. Hyukjae stops his horse by hugging her neck, calming her down. He looks to his left and right, checking the dusty, uneven roads. 

 

"Come to me," Hyukjae whispers.

And he waits. 

 

Like a wish granted, a metal bus rumbles from far away trudging through the road. He can hear the wheels crunching over rocks, and his heart soars. The bus passes by, and Hyukjae gets a glimpse of Donghae through its barred windows. He is looking at his lap, eyes solemn and in deep thought. 

 

"Donghae!" He calls. He makes his horse move. 

 

Donghae starts up, and looks out of his window to find Hyukjae trailing the bus. "What are you doing?!"

The men around him murmurs in excitement. 

 

"Stop the bus!" Donghae calls to the bus driver. 

"I have other places to be, young man."

"Please! Just a few minutes!" 

 

The bus driver grumbles and curses, but slows down nonethelessly. However, Donghae jumps before it stops and runs behind to get to Hyukjae.

 

"Why must you be so stubborn?!" Donghae scolds, but he pulls back the rest of his words because he can never use this tone with Hyukjae. "You are worrying me."

"Take me with you," Hyukjae demands, tears finally coming down his face. "I'll go anywhere, Donghae. Please, just take me with you."

 

Donghae also feels his own tears coming. "I can't," he forces out through his thickening throat. "My life outside this place is not for you, it's terrible, and you will despise me for bringing you into a life like mine."

 

Donghae approaches Hyukjae, who carefully balanced himself on Sandy's back and leans towards him

 

"I love you," Hyukjae says. 

"Hyuk," Donghae protests.

 

Hyukjae covers Donghae's mouth with his hand to stop him.

 

"I love you," he repeats. "And I will love you through ardous winters and humid springs, through long summers and solemn autumns. I love you, and I mean it."

 

Hyukjae uncovers Donghae's mouth and replaces it with his own lips. Donghae stands on his tiptoes to receive the kiss, and he feels Hyukjae's long fingers trail on his jaw. Then Hyukjae pulls away. 

"And I swear I'll mean it year after year, if that's what you're worried about."

 

Hyukjae stares at Donghae, and finally lets him go. He turns away to ride the opposite direction. 

 

The bus honks, and Donghae is brought back to the present. He hurries to the bus, where the men immediately congratulated him, and even gave him some coins and a few paper bills for his future- an uncertain one, but set on one person. 

As the distance grew longer, Donghae looks at the faded picture that Hyukjae had given him, then flips to the back, where his eyes immediately went to Hyukjae's pretty handwriting. 

 

"Wherever you go, wherever you are, look at the moon, the stars and our night skies and know that you will always have a home and a family here, with me." 

-Hyukjae

 

Donghae traces the lipstick beside Hyukjae's name, and he grins.


	10. Chapter 10

Heechul takes a handful of the soil, examining its dry texture, and lets it sift through his fingers. It comes down to the dry, cracked ground, its rocky and rough bits bouncing off or breaking into tinier pieces. He surveys the land, where no crop had survived the heat. The once flourishing fields are dried and frayed; there were no signs of its luscious green grass nor its beautiful array of flowers and fruits. 

He hears footsteps behind him-footsteps that he has ingrained into his heart. 

Leeteuk comes to a stop beside him, their shoulders lightly touching. 

 

"How is he?" Heechul asks quietly. Sweat runs down his reddening face.

"Still feverish and pale. He's been sweating through his clothes," Leeteuk replies gravely. "He barely eats."

 

Heechul purses his lips, his face grim. 

 

"But he will get better," Leeteuk chirps in faked enthusiasm. 

Hot wind blows by them, almost burning their skin. 

 

Heechul swallows the clump in his throat. "His parents died from this disease, Teuk."

 

Leeteuk puts a gentle arm around him. "Hyukjae's strong, remember? Stronger than any man we've known. So you have to be strong with him, okay?"

 

Heechul nods. "Oh you, what would I do without you?"

Leeteuk chuckles. "Hopefully, we'll never have to find out, hm?"

 

//

 

"Stop...coming in here," Hyukjae forces out through gritted teeth. 

 

Sungmin merely glances at Hyukjae and replaces the towel on his forehead. "If I'm meant to get sick, then I should have been by now."

"Noona's expecting-" Hyukjae suddenly coughs, his neck tightening from the effort. 

 

Tears gather in Hyukjae's eyes, but he is too dehydrated to let them fall. His body convulses in a sickening way, his chest spasming as he coughs some more.

 

"Anything from Donghae?" Hyukjae asks for the thousandth time when he regains his voice.

"No."

 

Sungmin internally cringes at the state Hyukjae is in. His cheeks are more hollow than ever, and his eyes are sinking into his skull. 

Hyukjae feels his heart beat in his throat. "That bastard, he said he'll write," he murmurs weakly. 

 

He feels his eyes give up, and Sungmin's hand on his forehead.

 

//

 

Donghae finds work under Kim Ryeowook, who owns a small ranch somewhere in the east, near the sea. He has three friends that were born from different countries, Henry, Zhoumi and Hangeng. 

They taught him how to speak their language and also how to manage the land. Ryeowook gives his friends so much reign over his land that it becomes unclear who is the owner. 

 

At night, Henry plays his fiddle while Donghae plays his guitar. 

It feels different, though. because he's not doing this with Hyukjae. He appreciates Henry's passion for music-he really does, but the pristine magic he feels whenever he's with Hyukjae is not there. It almost feels wrong. 

He's been away from home for too long.

 

One night, Hangeng sits with him, peeling him some oranges. 

 

"You have a sweetheart?" Hangeng asks. "You're always sad, looking towards the distance." He hands Donghae a peeled orange. 

Donghae couldn't help smiling. "Yes, I actually do."

Hangeng frowns. "Why are you here then?"

 

"I'm trying to earn enough money to give hi-her a life."

Hangeng side eyes him. "She doesn't need a life from you. She needs you by her side."

 

Donghae stares at Hangeng. 

 

"How long you been away?"

"Almost a year."

"You making her wait that long? What if she finds another man?"

 

Donghae cringes. That's what he's been afraid of. 

 

"Just build her a house or something. You two need a home first."

 

Donghae smirks at Hangeng's blunt advices. The next day, he asks Ryeowook for his final pay and left at the end of the day after completing all the needed tasks. 

He takes out the picture of Hyukjae from his knapsack and studies it for the thousandth time, and he keeps going. 

 

//

 

Heechul gives Donghae a curious look. 

"What are you doing here? I sent out a notice that there's a drought down here and you men are better off working in the factories or mines looking for gold."

 

Donghae glances at the land behind him. He has a feeling that somehow...it got smaller. "What happened to your land? Other than the drought?"

Heechul smiles with tight lips. He now remembers why he liked Donghae. He is very straightforward and honest. 

 

"We sold parts of it to a railroad company."

Donghae's eyes widened in shock. "What? Why? How does Hyukjae feel about this?"

 

Heechul puts a hand on Donghae's shoulder and gives him an apologetic look. "Hyukjae has been very ill. He can barely move, and his fever has been going on for so long."

Donghae steps forward to pass Heechul, but the older man stops him. 

 

"We used the money to get cures, but they aren't working. Our country is not advanced enough to heal him."

 

Donghae feels his heart crush in that moment. He wasted so much time away from him, thinking that if he can be patient and bide his time, he can earn enough money to buy a future. He's a fool. Hangeng was right-Hyukjae doesn't need anything from him, he only needed him to be by his side. 

And Donghae should've have known that. 

 

"Don't blame yourself," Heechul says, sensing Donghae's apparent distress.

"Did he at least get my letters?" Donghae asks. 

 

Heechul raised an eyebrow. "You sent letters?"

 

//

 

Hyukjae squints through the light, his blurry vision coming to a clear slowly. He can make out a silhouette beside him, but it was hard to turn to his side, or even just turn his neck. Hyukjae waits, and he breathes in and out, and he opens his mouth to make a sound but he only hears a small whine come out. He bites his dry lips and tries again, and this time, the silhouette rises up in alarm. 

 

"Hyukjae," he hears Donghae's voice utter. 

 

Hyukjae feels tears building up in his eyes, but not enough to fall. Maybe he's finally lost his mind from this fever. 

 

"Shh, shh, don't move, I'm here, I'm back," Donghae soothes him, a hand on his cheek. "I won't leave."

 

Hyukjae closes his eyes, trying to gather some strength. It takes him a while, but finally, through harsh breathing, he forms his words. 

"You didn't write," Hyukjae mutters. 

Donghae carresses his cheek. "I did write, my sweet. It seems the letters got lost on the way to you."

"That's too bad," Hyukjae tries to joke. He exhales harshly through his nose. "I want you to rewrite each one then."

 

Donghae chuckles. "As demanding as ever."

"I couldn't...change."

"Of course not."

Hyukjae coughs, his neck straining to get it out. 

 

Donghae immediately sits him up, and earns pained groans from Hyukjae. 

 

"What-why-you'll...sick," Hyukjae forces out of his throat. 

"I know," Donghae comforts him, running a hand on his back gently. 

"You should stay away."

"Are you kidding me? After all my time apart from you?"

"Romantic, but not smart."

"I'm always a fool for you."

"It's not a good thing," Hyukjae wheezes.

 

Donghae frowns in worry. Underneath his palm, he can feel Hyukjae's spine individually. 

"I will look for a job in town," Donghae tells Hyukjae, who is slowly leaning towards him. "I've earned some money to provide you a good life."

Hyukjae closes his eyes. Nothing has changed from Donghae's voice. It is still tender and sweet, so calming like leaves rustling from the summer breeze while relaxing under the shade of trees. 

 

"You came back," Hyukjae murmurs against his neck. 

"Of course I did. I meant every word I said."

"I know. You always do."

 

Donghae smiles despite everything. He cradles Hyukjae's small form into his arms, and he kisses his head. 

"Hae?"

"Hm?"

"I mean it. Rewrite every word."

 

Donghae laughs. "I will, I will."

 

//

 

"I don't know...he's not looking good," Yesung said, a friend of Leeteuk, who workds as a physician in the town. 

Leeteuk folds his hands and places them under his small, defined jaw. "Please, is there anything else we can do?"

Yesung shrugs. "We've tried everything, Teuk."

"I know, I know...but he's my son, Yeye. He's my only son." Leeteuk says, fighting back tears. "Were there any survivors from this disease?"

 

Yesung looks at Leeteuk straight in the eye. "Yes. There were. But only a few though."

 

"He will survive," Donghae says, walking into the dining area. "He has to. He's strong. Leeteuk, you know this."

Leeteuk and Yesung looks at Donghae, who is also tearing up. 

 

Leeteuk smiles at Donghae warmly. "I'm so glad you can join us." He glances at Yesung. "This is Donghae...Hyukjae's lover. And Donghae, this is Yesung, my best friend."

Donghae nods at Yesung. 

 

Yesung taps his chin thoughtfully. "Hm...we haven't tried this option though. A change of scenery and air might be good for him."

 

Donghae remembers the sea, and its peaceful waves, and the oranges, and Henry's fiddle. 

 

"I know a place," Donghae suggests, and he slides into a seat beside Leeteuk to discuss and get permission to take Hyukjae somewhere else. 

 

//

 

Amidst rewriting the letters that Donghae had written once before, he insists on taking care of Hyukjae most of the time. He had convinced Hyukjae's fathers to take him by the sea, amongst other things. He watches Hyukjae through the night, getting flits of sleep whenever he can. He helps him get his strength back, and sometimes it involved nasty fights, but he never gives up because it's Hyukjae. It was also a sign of Hyukjae's unwavering strength, and his determination to get better, so Donghae will be there for him with every step, like he had promised before. 

 

One day, Donghae completes all of the letters and he reads them all to Hyukjae.

After listening to Donghae's thoughts, Hyukjae stares at the ceiling. Then, he turns his head towards him-and he does it finally, god, without any pain. 

 

"Take me to the sea," Hyukjae requests. 

 

//

 

The travel was long and hard, especially for Hyukjae who has to endure every bumpy road and unmerciful sunny days. When they finally arrived by Ryeowook's place, Henry, Hangeng and Zhoumi scrambled to prepare them a bed, and Ryeowook retreated to his precious kitchen to cook everyone a good, hearty meal. 

When Donghae finally got Hyukjae to rest, he heads down to the kitchen to help with Ryeowook. 

 

Hangeng was there, chopping up some vegetables. 

 

"He your lover?"

"Yes," Donghae admits, a little wary. 

Hangeng smiles. "He's pretty."

Donghae chuckles, relieved. "Yes, yes he is."

 

Donghae assists Hyukjae to dinner, who is still having trouble walking. He has the energy to interact with people, and Donghae is so glad that he's slowly coming back. It still hurts to look at him because of his dangerous low weight, but slowly and surely, Hyukjae is getting better. His smiles are effortless, and his cough is lessening. 

At night, Donghae holds Hyukjae close to him so that he can feel his heart beat and his lungs pull in air. He didn't mean to be wary, but he also remembers that his parents had the same disease. 

 

"Do you still sing?" Hyukjae whispers to Donghae. Just outside, the sea softly washes up the shore, drowning the sand and the rocks, and then retreating. 

"What song do you want?" 

"Just sing."

 

Donghae chuckles, and he kisses Hyukjae on his cheek. 

 

"They used to tell me I was building a dream, and so I followed the mob, 

When there was earth to plow, or guns to bear, I was always there right on the job. 

They used to tell me I was building a dream, with peace and glory ahead, 

Why should I be standing in line, just waiting for bread?"

 

Hyukjae sleeps fitfully against him, a smile on his lips.

 

//

 

One day, Donghae wakes up without Hyukjae in his arms, and he immediately rolls off the bed in panic. The sea roars through the shore peacefully, and sunrise has barely touched the horizon. He looks around in the blue darkness, and spots a waif shape on the ground. 

"Hyuk?"

 

"Donghae," Hyukjae whispers loudly. "Help me walk."

 

Donghae goes to him without hesitation, and helps him stand up. "What are you doing?"

"Let's go watch the sun rise," Hyukjae says. 

Donghae pulls Hyukjae closer to him, almost lifting him off his feet. 

 

"No, let me walk. I want to walk. Don't carry me."

Donghae holds one of Hyukjae's arms as the younger takes a step forward. 

 

Hyukjae falters a little, his knees shaking from the effort, but he keeps going. Donghae supports him as he takes another step, and then another. They slowly make their way outside, sharing arms and legs. They step on sand, and Donghae slowly lets Hyukjae carry himself towards the sea, careful arms just behind him just in case he falls. 

Hyukjae makes small steps and big pauses, but he gets towards the water without falling. 

 

"I can walk," Hyukjae says. "Donghae, I can walk."

Donghae feels tears fall out of his eyes, and down to his cheeks. 

 

"Donghae, I can walk!" Hyukjae exclaims.

 

Hyukjae falls to Donghae, but he knows that Donghae is always there to catch him. They cry together, and they hold each other-more of Donghae's effort, but Hyukjae can get a high mark for trying. 

 

//

 

Hyukjae's strength grows day by day. His appetite is increasing, which pleased Ryeowook because he has been cooking nonstop, and there is someone who is willing to taste his dishes without complaining of being full. 

Every morning, Donghae and Hyukjae walk by the sea, hands together. 

 

Hyukjae's cough starts to disappear almost completely from inhaling the fresh sea breeze, and the sand under his feet makes his legs stronger as he keeps walking and sticking to his routine. 

Fall comes, and Hyukjae could run, slower than usual, but he runs freely, wherever he wants. 

As usual, Donghae chases after him, and together, they leave their worries behind by the sand dunes. 

 

They spend fall and winter in Ryeowook's ranch, speeding up Hyukjae's recovery. He is starting to gain healthy weight, which relieves Donghae, but he's still wary of picking him up out of nowhere in fear of manhandling him. 

Now that Hyukjae does not look deathly sick, he notices that Hyukjae had grown a few centimeters taller than him, although at times it seems like it's an illusion. 

 

Hyukjae kisses him harder, touches him in hotter places, his beguiling self coming back tenfold stronger than before. He finds all of Donghae's hidden places without trouble, and Donghae succumbs to him without hesitation. He lets Hyukjae have his way, lets him take it as further as he can until he can take over. Hyukjae's direction never felt wrong. 

Donghae had been wandering for so long and travelling nonstop. He didn't know where he was going, but now that he's with Hyukjae, it didn't matter. Through mountains, by the seas, through wide prairies and busy cities, he can be lost as long as he's with Hyukjae. 

 

//

 

They make love to each other in spring, two years past Hyukjae's adult age. 

Hyukjae, mischievous and scheming as always, stole a bottle of lube from Heechul and Leeteuk, somehow knowing that there will be a time when this moment would come. 

 

Donghae can only chuckle in amusement as he undresses Hyukjae, tugging off his shirt and tossing it aside. He can feel Hyukjae's willingness and his surrender, so he gives it all to Hyukjae. 

He runs his hands on Hyukjae's waist, hot and heavy as he kisses Hyukjae in his open mouth. 

 

He earns giggles from Hyukjae as Donghae blows on Hyukjae's sensitive spots, and also elicits sexy moans as he nibbles on his chocolate nipples until it's red and sensitive. 

Hyukjae's legs open wider under him, and feels him buckle up and rub against him, needing to get closer to him. 

 

Donghae takes off Hyukjae's trousers, and his too as well, baring themselves to each other. No boundaries, just each other in all their vulnerability. 

"Are you sure about this?" Donghae whispers, meeting Hyukjae's eyes. 

"Yes," Hyukjae tells him. "Still as sure two years ago when you refused me."

 

Donghae laughs. "I did not refuse you. We put it on hold."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever helps you sleep at night."

 

Donghae leans over his body, covering him with his own as if to protect him if ever the sky decides to fall, and kisses Hyukjae again, pouring himself into it, his longing, his hard and long journeys. Hyukjae receives him willingly, like a beacon in a stormy sea. They hold on to each other, promising to never let go. 

Figuring it out as they go, Donghae pours a generous amount of lube on his fingers. He plants a kiss on the base of Hyukjae's stomach, his cock brushing against his throat. 

Carefully, he massages Hyukjae's entrance until it becomes pliable enough to enter. He watches Hyukjae's face for pleasure and pain. Hyukjae encourages him, and tells him not to stop, although he was close to tears as he squints his eyes shut from the foreign intrusion. 

 

"Donghae," Hyukjae shyly moans. 

Donghae smiles gently at him, curling his fingers inside Hyukjae. "It's okay. It's just the two of us."

 

Hyukjae fingers dig into the sheets underneath him as Donghae increases his speed. He reaches down as well to pump himself, his hand twisting around his shaft, and he moans desperately. 

Donghae stares at the beautiful sight in front of him, from his fingers being taken in by Hyukjae's constricted heat, to the pale hand around his own core of pleasure, and into that small face, where his plump mouth is opening and moaning his name in pleasure. 

 

"Donghae, Donghae, now," Hyukjae calls to him desperately. "Take me, now, now, please."

Donghae was just as eager. He coats his own cock with lube, and then he pushes gently inside Hyukjae. 

 

Hyukjae tightens around him immediately, and Donghae chokes on his breath. 

 

"Babe, babe, wait, relax, hey," Donghae coaxes, running his hands on Hyukjae's waist, and then pumping his cock to distract him. 

 

Hyukjae squints his eyes shut and his breathing is rushed. His chest heaved, and his lower body quivered from Donghae's slow thrusting. He whines through tight lips, and tears fall from his eyes. 

Donghae leans over, and slides his hands under Hyukjae's arms. He kisses Hyukjae on the chin and then on his mouth. He deepens the kiss, sucking on his tongue playfully, and roving his mouth with a hot passion that he has felt for a long time. 

 

Donghae stops with another kiss on his chin. "Open your eyes for me?"

Hyukjae opens his eyes, the tension from his shoulders gone, and his body pliant and obedient to Donghae's control. 

 

"I have you," Donghae tells him. "I have you."

Hyukjae nods, the fear he felt earlier disappearing into nothingness. It's Donghae. He can trust him. 

 

"Ready?" 

"Yes," Hyukjae tells him, loud enough for Donghae to know that he means it. 

 

Donghae pushes inside him again, and Hyukjae moans for each thrust. Donghae takes his hand, and entwines it against his own on top of Hyukjae's head. When he finds that Hyukjae is receiving him without difficutly, the two of them settle into a slow, consistent rhythm. 

Hyukjae's wide eyes find Donghae's, and they stare at each other. 

"Faster," Hyukjae breathes out. 

 

Donghae obeys, and he drags his cock against Hyukjae's heat desperately. Hyukjae moans consistently, and for some reason, Donghae hears a fiddle starting up somewhere, but it is lost to him as Hyukjae calls him. 

"H-hae!" Hyukjae gasps, his unoccupied hand finding purchase on Donghae's broad shoulder. 

Donghae gives Hyukjae an alarmed look, but Hyukjae is enjoying himself. 

 

"Don't stop," Hyukjae tells him. 

 

Donghae lets go of Hyukjae's hand, and he grasps Hyukjae's hips and guides him into each thrust. He spears into Hyukjae, and the younger screams into the night, his mouth open and spurring endless obscenities. It encourages Donghae even more, and he lets Hyukjae take over, trusting him to finish him. Hyukjae's body archs, and he rolls it down, welcoming Donghae in full force. He tightens around Donghae every time he leaves, and he runs his nails down Donghae's broad back. 

 

Donghae groans, the veins on his neck protruding. He takes Hyukjae's cock into his hand and pumps it mercilessly, until Hyukjae spills himself on his hand. 

Hyukjae's body shakes from the orgasm, and he lets out a small scream as Donghae's rhythm is knocked off course, having a hunch that Donghae is nearing his release as well. 

 

"Hyukjae," Donghae breathes out. "Hyukjae."

Hyukjae cries some more as Donghae leans forward, kissing him desperately. 

 

Hyukjae grips Donghae's arms and locks his legs around his waist.

"Inside me," Hyukjae almost shouts, although he wasn't sure if he said it because of Donghae's hard thrusts. 

 

Donghae buries his face into Hyukjae's neck as he spurts his hot seed inside Hyukjae. 

The sound of their breathing was loud and rough, and Donghae stays inside Hyukjae, and he holds his lover closer than ever. 

 

"I love you," Donghae finally says, his heart beating for only one person, his mind and senses only taking in Hyukjae because there is no one like him. Not in a million miles. "God, I love you."


	11. Epilogue

"Keep your eyes closed," Donghae reminds Hyukjae, even though he has a hand over his eyes. 

Hyukjae groans exasperatedly. "Donghae, I've had them closed the whole way here."

 

Donghae chuckles, and guides Hyukjae forward, his hand on Hyukjae's lower back. "Okay, stay right there."

 

Donghae can feel Hyukjae's annoyance, but he finds it really endearing. He walks in front of Hyukjae, who is bunching his eyes together. He stares at him for a moment, but then he is reminded of what his purpose here today. 

 

"Okay, you can open them now!" Donghae exclaims. 

 

Hyukjae opens his eyes and his mouth immediately dropped when he saw what Donghae's surprise was. He covers his mouth as he lets out a strangled laugh, and he doubles over. Then he runs forward, tripping over himself to make his way to Donghae. 

Behind them was a very small botique, nameless and unadorned, but it is near one of the train station which makes it easily seen for possible customers. 

 

Hyukjae stares at Donghae with excitement, but a thought bugs him. "You didn't...mess with the gang members here, right?"

Donghae shakes his head. "No. All the money I earned these past years went to this shop."

"But Donghae, this is, wow," Hyukjae stares at the dark interior of the shop. "Thank you."

 

Donghae grins widely, and he pulls Hyukjae closer to him. "Now, you can sell all the products that you make here."

Hyukjae purses his lips. "What about you?" 

"Where else would I be?"

"Are you sure?"

"Of course. There are things I can do here. I can go advertise and pull in customers. Carry the heavy load for you. I can do anything you ask of me."

Hyukjae rolls his eyes. "I...don't even know what to say. Because you'll be telling me that we're suppose to do everything together."

 

Donghae laughs. "Yes. That's the point."

Hyukjae hugs Donghae around his waist, and then plants a small kiss on his cheek. "Thank you, husband."

 

//

 

Donghae finally, after so many years, convinced Hyukjae to marry him. They didn't need to get any official paper from the government, but they had a private ceremony with close friends and family by the sea, near Ryeowook's land. It was a simple wedding with vows they made on their own. Zhoumi sang for them, while Henry serenaded them with his fiddle. After the whole ordeal, Donghae and Hyukjae walked beside the sea, hands joined together. 

They spent the majority of walking in silence, with shy glances being thrown when the other is not looking. 

When they were finally making their way back, Donghae stops Hyukjae and pulls him closer. 

 

"You make a beautiful husband," Donghae teases, hands on Hyukjae's waist. 

"What are you doing?" Hyukjae asks, a bit confused. 

 

"What, I can't compliment my husband?" 

 

Hyukjae rolls his eyes. All these years with Donghae had really softened and opened up Donghae. He's more cheesy and affectionate, and more determined to snuff out any space Hyukjae had for himself. 

 

"Wow, where did that tearful, I do go?" Donghae asks, planting many kisses down Hyukjae's face. 

"Up your ass," Hyukjae sarcastically replies without thinking, but when heard himself, he stops breathing. 

 

Donghae laughs out loud, maybe a bit too much. 

 

"Oh, all right, I thought we'd go to dinner first...but since you want to skip to the best part-" 

 

Donghae scoops Hyukjae up, one arm under the back of his legs, and the other supporting his waist. 

 

"Wait, Donghae!" 

"Let's go!" 

 

//

 

Like all married couples, they all had to navigate through bumps in the relationship. 

Donghae worked in a bar where different types of people congregated. It wasn't always safe. When the night wears on and the crowd becomes rowdy, sometimes a fight could break out. Donghae wasn't very lucky when he tried to stop what was happening, and he ends up in a holding cell. 

When Hyukjae got the word, he was livid. He dressed as a girl, but he is now more defined in places he wasn't when he was a teenager. It's not something he does often anymore, it was more of a hobby now than a job, but he's not happy about doing this just to get what he needs.

 

"I want to see Lee Donghae," he says in a strict voice.

"He will be released tomorrow without bail." 

"Just let me see him, I'm his wife!" Hyukjae shouts, knowing that it will make the guards give in. Who would say no to a woman trying to see their husband? 

 

Luckily, the guards were pretty convinced.

 

Hyukjae sees Donghae sitting inside the bars, his head down and his shoulders defeated. 

 

"What happened?" Hyukjae asks Donghae, his voice cold. 

Donghae scrambles to get up. "Hyuk-"

"Are you fucking kidding me? I told you to be careful when working here! Bar brawls are dangerous, and sometimes weapons are involved!"

"I didn't fight! I was trying to stop them!"

Hyukjae grits his teeth. "It's not your job!"

 

Donghae stops, and stares at Hyukjae. "I was trying to help."

"Well, don't! It's not worth losing your life over!"

 

Donghae senses that Hyukjae is near to tears, and that his anger comes from being fear.

 

Hyukjae adjusts his floppy hat. "Stay here until they release you, then head straight home. You're much safer here than anywhere else. Reflect on what you did."

 

Hyukjae turns away from Donghae without a glance, and Donghae sinks back down to his seat. He did not blame Hyukjae, because he rarely gets angry. He understands, even though with his impossible, stubborn logic, that Hyukjae was afraid that something could have happened to him. Hyukjae was always a reasonable person, but he also has a tendency to panic when things do not go his way, or when the people around him are putting themselves in danger. That's when he acts without thinking. 

 

When Donghae was released the next day, he goes home immediately like he was told. Hyukjae was waiting for him at the front porch, toned arms crossed across his chest and his face hard. 

Donghae stops just by the stairs, and he sighs. 

 

"Hyuk-"

"I'm sorry," Hyukjae blurts out. Then, his facade breaks open and he starts crying right in front of Donghae. 

Donghae immediately comes to Hyukjae and gathers him in his arms. "I'm sorry, too. I should've thought better."

Hyukjae shakes his head. "No, no. I know I shouldn't be mad at you like that, I know your actions came from a good place. You were doing that because it's right to you, and I'm sorry."

"But still, I know I should've been more careful."

 

Donghae pulls Hyukjae back to kiss him on his lips. 

 

Hyukjae sighs. "I don't know what I'm trying to ask of you. You're always gonna do what you think is righteous. And I'm never gonna ask you to change that."

Donghae brushes his thumb across Hyukjae's lips. "Okay."

Hyukjae nods and kisses Donghae's thumb. "Just...be careful."

 

//

 

Donghae picked the perfect place to set up their business.

The country is slowly getting back to its feet, and their town is growing continuously to the point that it should be renamed as a city. Their shop with all the confectionaries and beauty products are gaining a lot of attention, especially for those who are boarding or unboarding the train. The botique was an eye-catcher especially for women, who tugs their noble boyfriends and husbands to make them buy something.

Hyukjae was able to hire help from the ever growing customers, and when he has time, he teaches Donghae what he knows. 

Donghae also utilizes his new learned skills to make something for Hyukjae, who he knows is starting to have achy shoulders and sore hands from his hard work. 

 

One day, Hyukjae was setting up for the morning, when he saw small child darting out of a store and into an alley. 

 

"Get that kid!" A man shouts. 

 

A bunch of teenagers panned out, and Hyukjae sighs. 

 

Donghae comes up behind him, carrying some more of their products. "Something wrong?"

"Hm?"

"Is there any particular reason why you're so dressed up today?" 

 

Hyukjae smiles secretively. "Put on your suit jacket."

"What? Why?"

"Just do it!" Hyukjae looks into the shop. "Kyuhyun! Can you please watch the shop? I'm gonna go somewhere with Donghae!"

"Sure! Don't be out too long!" 

 

Donghae gives Hyukjae a curious look as he puts on his new jacket, and follows him through town as they navigate through the crowded streets, and through popular shops. Hyukjae stops abruptly, causing Donghae to bump up behind him, and together, they gaze at the shop in front of them. It was a photography shop, and Hyukjae pulls Donghae inside with excitement. 

 

"Hello again, sir," Hyukjae greets. "I brought my friend."

Donghae internally cringes at the word, but he does his best to not let it show. 

 

"This way," the man points them towards the back, where a black drape is hanging down from the wall. 

 

Hyukjae pulls Donghae to sit beside him, and they look straight ahead to the camera, where the man covers himself with a drape to work on it. 

 

"Smile," Hyukjae encourages. 

 

A few moments later, the camera flashes, blinding them with white light. 

 

//

 

Donghae grabs on to Hyukjae's hand as they sneak through the small alleys to make their way back to the shop, holding onto it tightly. Hyukjae was about to open his mouth and suggest that they go grab something to eat first when a child barrels into them, and knocks his hand away from Donghae. 

 

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" The child quickly apologizes in tears.

 

Donghae glances at Hyukjae to make sure he's okay, then he bends down on one knee to look the child in the eye. "Hi, it's all right. Are you okay?"

The child looks up, his big eyes staring at Donghae with fear. 

 

"Don't cry," Donghae tells him, wiping his tears away from his dirty face. "Where are your parents?"

"I don't have any," the child says. 

 

Hyukjae's heart lurches, and he lowers himself as well to face the child. "Do you have a name?" 

The child sniffs. "Jeno," he mumbles. 

"Jeno?" Donghae repeats. "That's a beautiful name. Why are you running around like this?"

 

Hyukjae's eyes go to the bread in his hand, and to his thin body from malnutrition. "Hey, Jeno. I'm sorry that you don't have any parents. Do you have anywhere to stay?"

Jeno shakes his head. 

Hyukjae pats Jeno on the shoulder. "Okay. I'm Lee Hyukjae, by the way. Nice to meet you."

"I'm Lee Donghae."

"You're both Lees? Are you two married?"

Hyukjae smiles widely. "Aren't you cute?" Then he gestures at the bread. "That's not enough for a growing kid. Let's get you some real food, okay? Then we'll work out where you can stay safely."

 

Jeno shakes his head. "I don't have anywhere."

Donghae's heart starts to hurt. 

 

"There he is!" 

 

Hyukjae springs to his feet, and comes in front of Jeno and Donghae, his legs wide and his shoulders squared. Donghae hauls Jeno into his arms protectively, staring at the rough teenagers who are chasing Jeno. 

 

"Have you got no shame?" Hyukjae drawls. "You, going after a little kid?"

"He stole from a shop!"

"And if you beat him up for a piece of bread, you're no better than a thief!" 

 

One of the teenagers comes forward, unruly and muscular for his age. Hyukjae takes a deep breath. 

 

"You really do not want to try me," Hyukjae says, his voice hardening. He doesn't take a step forward, but the teenagers falter in their advance. "I'm stronger than I look."

 

Donghae glares at them from behind. 

 

A teenager shouts and runs forward, but Hyukjae only sidesteps and kicked the back of his legs to make him fall. Donghae steps aside as well, comforting a crying Jeno. 

"I won't punch a kid, but if you insist," Hyukjae threatens, forming a fist and cracking it. 

 

The teenagers stared at him, and then they scattered. 

 

Jeno starts to giggle in Donghae's arms, and Hyukjae turns around, laughing brightly. 

"How was that kid? They won't be bothering you now! Let's go grab our lunch!"

 

//

 

Jeno keeps following them everywhere, that they had no choice but to take him home with them. Heechul and Leeteuk were more than delighted, and it gave Sungmin and Saeun's children another playmate. Donghae was more than excited to maybe adopt Jeno, since he was so ready to a possibility of having a child. Hyukjae, other than being wary of accidentally kidnapping someone's child, couldn't help but think of all the things he can't give Donghae. He looks at Jeno, and maybe he's imagining it, but he reminds him of Donghae and it just saddens him even more. 

Hyukjae stares at Heechul's farm, remembering how wide and full the lands were. Now in the distance, there are rail tracks, and small stops being created, which were growing into smaller towns. 

 

He sighs. Time has done a lot of changing his environment, but it never bothered him since Donghae had always stayed the same. It was one of the things that made Hyukjae love Donghae even more, that made him promise his forever to Donghae.

 

"Whatcha thinking, kid?" He hears Heechul say behind him. 

Hyukjae glances towards his aging uncle. "Nothing."

"It's not nothing. Is it because of Jeno?"

 

Hyukjae stays silent. 

 

"That's a yes." Heechul laughs softly. "You know...when me and Teuk had to raise you, we were very uncertain."

Hyukjae stares at Heechul.

 

"We thought we weren't good enough. What if we can't give you everything you needed and fail you as your parents?" Heechul smiles, wistful. "Those kind of things."

 

Hyukjae sighs. "I just feel like Donghae had settled for less with me."

"How so?"

"Well, I can't even give him children."

Heechul bursts out laughing. 

 

Hyukjae rolls his eyes. "What?"

"Have you seen how Donghae looks at you, Hyukjae?" Heechul begins, sobering up. "He looks at you as if you have given him the world, as if you're the most beautiful creature that he's ever seen in his life-"

"Okay, stop," Hyukjae interrupts. 

 

Heechul laughs loudly again. "Look, Hyukjae. You need to get it out of your head that only families with a man and a woman in it can thrive. I mean, look at us!" 

Hyukjae pouts. 

 

Heechul gives him an inquisitive look. "Is that why you wouldn't marry Donghae at first?"

Hyukjae nods hesitantly. 

 

"Oh my god, Hyukjae. From the moment you were born, you were never meant to conform to society. You are so much more than that. Why are you so worried about this?"

"Because! It's normal and stable. Donghae has seen the world change around him, wouldn't he deserve a peaceful life?"

"It's only when he's with you, he feels peace. I have seen weary men travel around and they never get any rest no matter where they were." Heechul suddenly scratches his head irritably. "You know what, you should know this already! Why are you being like this?!"

 

Hyukjae gapes at Heechul.

 

"Stop moping! You were never worried about this in the first place when you two would sneak around the farm to fuck! Go be with your husband, and live happily ever after!" 

 

Hyukjae immediately stands up, and smiles at Heechul apologetically, trying not to feel embarrassed.

"Thank you, uncle."

 

"Yeah, yeah. Stop being stupid because I didn't raise a stupid kid."

 

//

 

"Hand me that hammer, Jeno," Donghae asks the child. 

 

Jeno immediately scrambles to get the tool Donghae had asked for, and dashes to give it to him. 

 

Donghae smiles warmly at the kid. "Don't run when you're carrying heavy and sharp things. You'll hurt yourself."

 

Jeno nods obediently, and he gazes at the pile of wood Donghae is working on. 

 

"Here, let me show you how to use this," Donghae says and Jeno comes closer. "Put your hands on the handle."

 

Donghae holds the nail between his two fingers, and with the other hand, he guides Jeno with the hammer. 

 

"Yep, just like that. So when you do this, when you're older, make sure to watch for your fingers. Because getting it smashed by a hammer is not fun."

 

Jeno giggles softly, enjoying the up and down motion of the hammer. 

 

In the distance, Hyukjae watches the two bond, and he feels his heart soften. He can live with this. He can be a good parent to Jeno, if that's what is required of him. He doesn't mind all the challenges that will accompany them of becoming a family. They will be alright. Through ardous winters and humid springs, through long summers and gloomy autumns, wherever these seasons that will become years will take them, it is best spent with each other. 

 

Hyukjae watches them for a bit, smiling whenever Donghae makes Jeno laugh. 

After waiting for a bit, Hyukjae walks closer. 

 

"Boys, lunch!" He calls. 

 

Donghae and Jeno perk up at his voice. Jeno excitedly runs towards him, while Donghae walks behind, strong and sure, the sun on his face-touching his eyes with a brightness that infects everyone with joy. 

 

_Uncle's right...he does look at me like that._

 

All of his fears and doubts melt away when Jeno goes to his embrace, and Donghae gives him a small kiss on his temple. Together, they make their way towards the white house on the hill for lunch, laughing and smiling, under the merciful skies that granted them every wandering wish.

Life will always go through changes like the seasons, but one thing is always certain:  _home._

 

 

THE END


	12. Author's Notes

This was originally posted in AFF: [Where seasons will take me](https://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/1397784)

This was inspired by the Great Depression Era because of the seasonal workers and factories and the gangs in bustling cities making bootleg alcohol, but before that, like in the mid to late 1800s, there was this art movement that portrays the great lands of America. They painted beautiful sceneries of mountains, rivers, canyons, waterfalls, trails, etc. They all had one common theme: what the Great Wild West offered. These paintings help spur the movement to the West. (Not that it was always good, but that's another topic.)

Sceneries were kind of based on that, on how clear and vivid they looked. I wanted to put a lot of emphasis on the setting because it would bring out the romance and make it seem like time has not passed, but it is really catching up. 

 

At the turn of the century, there were several wars going outside of America, because of their conquest for land. (Again, not a good thing.) America also got involved in the Great War, and during this war a lot of diseases were spread, and there was an epidemic going around. After the Great War, the roaring 20s happened. People were all about that jazz, but they were all hiding their disillusionment from the war. People started hating foreigners even more, racism and inequality ensues, and immigration from other countries from Europe and Asia increased. Then because of some land speculation and bank problems, the Great Depression Era came. 

Ranchers, cowboys, etc. started becoming more popular. The West has droughts, and people lost jobs in the cities. Gangs formed, families starved and became homeless. The economy slumped. Not just America's, but most of the world too. 

It wasn't just "depression" for the economy, people literally lost hope during this time. They moved around, hoping for a better place, but all they find sometimes, is another downgraded version of their previous circumstance. 

 

Anyways, aside from being obsessed with science, I'm also a history geek so I'm like ahduahfuhjaf !!!! 

 

Now to our main characters: :D

 

Hyukjae

-a teenager, seems immature, but he always puts family first 

-loves crossdressing since he and his mom did it all the time, she was her best friend, but she died :( 

-crossdressing became his mask, so he won't have to show his emotions, and he pretended; all the things he said has another meaning to it (which infuriated Donghae)

-very strong, "farm strong" he claims

-stubborn, won't let death get to him

-but very kind, looks out for everyone in his own way

-hates inequality

-never lets any man beat him, except Hae (but it's not like he gives him a chance hahaha)

 

Donghae

-gullible, very trusting even though he tries to hide it 

-righteous in Hyukjae's eyes, honest and always means his words, always straight to the point

-innocent in a way, has a loner kind of feel around him, never could belong anywhere

-when he met closed off Hyukjae, this also made him soften up because he won't force it out of Hyukjae, no, he opens his heart instead and lets Hyukjae know that there is good 

-he's been wandering ever since he was young, and finally, he finds Hyukjae, his endgame, the one who points him to a direction and he goes

 

Anyways, thank you again!

 

Also...that fiddle in the love scene was Henry, because EunHae was too loud. 


	13. Songs

Songs that helped me write this story, and set up the mood:

 

[Summertime Sadness by Lana del Rey](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QAORq-KCPRc)

[Sori by Lee Suhyun](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MR6Cu-iHpuU)

[Bel Air by Lana del Rey](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bXWWqeo-hE)

[Lost by Super Junior D&E](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxRwCwMU0lw)

[Music to My Eyes by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePFwJk_RNR4)

[Mariners Apartment Complex by Lana del Rey](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTEKg1Ly0zY)

[Untitled Love Song by Henry Lau](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Xy1BpQ9exQ)

[Still You by Super Junior D&E](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BMkrwSLmjvI) 


End file.
